


Hieros Gamos Kentros

by IShouldBeWriting, Morrigans_Eve (Aoife)



Category: Primeval
Genre: Other, Supernatural Elements, Threesome - F/F/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2011-04-02
Updated: 2011-08-26
Packaged: 2017-10-18 18:33:01
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 21
Words: 72,381
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/191943
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/IShouldBeWriting/pseuds/IShouldBeWriting, https://archiveofourown.org/users/Aoife/pseuds/Morrigans_Eve
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Captain Fiona "Fee" Black was a former classmate of Captain Becker's from Sandhurst.  She's joined the ARC and is in a relationship with field co-ordinator Jess Parker.  She's glad to be out of combat and living a stable life for once.  But the world has other ideas...</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Prologue

**Author's Note:**

> Huge thanks go to [](http://jooles34.livejournal.com/profile)[**jooles34**](http://jooles34.livejournal.com/) who's been kind enough to beta for us. [](http://morrigans-eve.livejournal.com/profile)[](http://morrigans-eve.livejournal.com/)**morrigans_eve** created Fee for her "Shattered Mirror" series. Fee got under my skin and into my head. A bunch of people were trying to egg me on to write smut which turned into the comment smut .. This story grew out of the conversation we were having while that short piece was written. Now at more than 20k of words, its been an absolutely wonderful collaborative process. And heaven help us, last week this sucker developed a serious plot. *hides head from the thought of 2 epic projects pounding at my door*

~~oOOo~~Fee smiled at the irony of it all; she’d been in her cups when it’d first come up. That was the only explanation Fee could ever think of for why the conversation hadn’t turned out very differently.

~~oOOo~~  
Each year as Samhain drew near and the walls between the worlds grew thin, Fee found herself questioning the wisdom of the geas she carried. Something about the combination of her charge as protector and the ancient holiday revering the dead always seemed to crawl under her skin like maggots. She could never say why but the half seen revenants of the world of the dead delighted in parading before her for just one fortnight each year. It set Fee’s teeth on edge and after three days of putting up with it, Jess insisted they do something to blunt the edges, if only for a little while. Fee thought that getting pissed would easily do the job. Even if it were only temporary it’d be just a few hours less during which she had to watch the unseen horrors that slid silently among the living and so she had acquiesced.

She’d been on her third round of tequila, intent on ignoring the shade of a little child, when Jess had brought the conversation round to Captain Becker.

“You know him better than I, Fee. Has he always been like this?”

Fee blinked owlishly as she set her shot glass down with precise care and beckoned to the bartender for another drink.

“Like what, baby girl?” she drawled, the slow Southern heat of the Kentucky/ Tennessee border creeping into her voice in a way she normally held at bay.

“Sad,” Jess replied wistfully, “and so very contained. Sometimes he seems so tightly drawn in on himself that it’s positively painful to watch.”

Fee shook her head. There were plenty of men in the ARC’s SAS squadron who still had symptoms of PTSD. Fee took for granted that Jess already understood what she was seeing where the military officers at the ARC were concerned, so she assumed that Jess didn’t think that was Becker’s problem. What Becker was doing to himself was different. Unknowingly Jess had asked that question of the one person in the ARC who probably understood it well enough to give her a proper explanation.

“He’s trapped between wanting to fulfil his duty to protect the men under his command, and trying to distance himself from everything and everyone around him. He feels that he’s failed. He’s lost so many of his charges: Nick, Sarah, Danny, Abby, Connor. He can’t be close enough to you all to protect you, without being hurt when yet another person dies; and it’s slowly tearing him apart.”

“But Abby, Connor, they’ve come back. And we still don’t know yet, Danny might come back some day as well.”

“That’s not the point, kitten. He’s trapped between wanting the comfort of being close and needing the distance to perform his duty.”

“Then why don’t you feel that way, Fee?” Jess asked, genuinely puzzled as to how the two officers could be so alike and yet so very different.

“Much as this time of year might drive me just a bit mad, I’ve made my peace with death and dying. I’ve accepted our part in it and I’ve chosen to make the most of the life I’m given while it is still mine to live.”


	2. Prologue

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Becker and Jess have an embarrassing conversation that's going to lead them all off into uncharted territory.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Big big thanks to [](http://jooles34.livejournal.com/profile)[**jooles34**](http://jooles34.livejournal.com/) for the beta service!

They sat at a table in the corner waiting for yet another round of drinks to arrive. Fee looked sideways at Jess trying to gauge exactly how drunk her lover was. She was leaning back against the wall, dark hair coming loose of its complicated knot. Not surprisingly it appeared that the petite co-ordinator didn’t have nearly her partner’s tolerance for drink. On Jess’ other side Fee could see Becker watching Jess as well. Unaware that he was being watched, Fee could see something she’d never seen before in Becker’s expression; longing.

As she looked across her lover at her old friend, she found herself struck by the beauty of them both as a pair. She’d been objectively aware that Becker was an attractive man for many years, but her training meant she’d always dismissed any possibility of him as a potential partner. Even if the military didn’t, she had her own rules about not getting involved with men beside whom she might some day be forced to fight, or die. If it hadn’t been for the expression on his face right now as he watched Jess, Fee might never have considered it. But now the thought wouldn’t leave her head; what would a man with that much focus and intensity be like in bed?

With a smile for Jess, Fee rose unsteadily to her feet and headed toward the washroom. She needed another drink, and maybe a cold splash of water to get her thinking clearly again.

~~oOOo~~

“Are you head-blind?” he asked curiously.

“Am I what?” Jess puzzled.

“Head-blind. Here, it’s easier if I just-” he broke off with a vague gesture, trying to find a way to explain what he was about to do. If Fee knew about this she’d probably shoot him, but the protective young captain was still in the lady’s room so for the moment he was safe.

Jess watched curiously as Becker closed his eyes, drew a few deep, steadying breaths, then lightly touched the back of her hand where it rested on the bar. The jolt of electricity where he’d touched her made her jerk back in surprise and indignation.

“Oi, dirty trick, Becker. Here I am trying to have a serious conversation with you and you’re up to practical jokes.”

Wordlessly, Becker leaned back to show that his other hand was planted firmly on the brass rail below the bar counter.

“I know you’ve got enough understanding of basic physics to know that I shouldn’t have been able to shock you while touching this,” he said.

This time when he stroked his finger across the back of her hand, the tingle of current was more contained, sliding across her nerves like the phantom pins and needles of a limb that’s fallen asleep, like the feeling of kissing Fee sometimes. Something of her thoughts must have shown in her expression because that sexy trademark smirk slid onto Becker’s face as he watched the penny drop.

“Figured it out finally, have you?” he asked.

“You. She- “Jess stuttered, trying to organize her thoughts into some semblance of order as her entire world view shifted on its axis. “I know about Fee’s geas. Have for as long as we’ve been together. But you too?”

Becker wiggled his hand back and forth in an indolent gesture.

“Not quite the same, but there’s some commonalities.”

“And the question about being head-blind?” Jess asked persistently like a dog with a bone.

“You’re not,” he replied with certainty. “If you were, you never would have noticed what I just did.”

“You’re still not making any sense, Becker. Yes, I’m aware of things like the geas that Fee carries. I can sense it when she touches me. What does that matter?” Jess asked in frustration and no little amount of puzzlement.

“From what I’ve seen, Fee’s been barely keeping it together for at least a week now. Lord knows why, but she’s carrying around too much power, even with that blasted geas of hers. Since you’re not head-blind, she should have been able to use you to send some of that power to ground. So why hasn’t she?”

Jess coloured a bright scarlet that instantly made Becker suspicious.

“Would having sex - lots of sex - qualify as having tried?”

And suddenly the constantly frayed and worn look he’d noticed about Jess for the past week made sense. How typical of the woman, Becker thought to himself. She hadn’t bothered explaining what she was doing to poor Jess. Fee had simply tried to handle it on her own. Hoping that the unity of sex would provide her with the ground she needed to dump the extra energy which was clinging to her like iron filings to a magnet. It obviously hadn’t been working. Fee was still riding within a hair’s breath of her sanity and Jess looked like she needed to sleep for a week. Becker shook his head at the sheer stubborn idiocy of it all.

“Yes, lots of sex, particularly with someone she cares about, should have potentially been one way to ground the extra energy,” he said with a pointed look.  



	3. Hieros Gamos Kentros - Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Becker, Jess, and Fee make a startling realization.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> In case you missed it, here's the [prologue](http://community.livejournal.com/primeval_denial/2142631.html) and [chapter 1](http://community.livejournal.com/primeval_denial/2153160.html). Big big thanks to [](http://jooles34.livejournal.com/profile)[**jooles34**](http://jooles34.livejournal.com/) for the beta service!

Fee closed her eyes and pressed her head against the cool mirror. The unearthly power riding her was like needles beneath her skin, intoxicating and exhilarating - and far wilder than she was used to. Her usual rituals for dispelling an excess like this weren't even beginning to touch it. It was starting to eat away at her inhibitions.

A deep breath, and the geas mark of her goddess emblazoned on her wrist burned. The hair on the back of her neck stood uncomfortably on end as Fee’s hand went for her absent pistol. She'd left Jess with Becker at the bar and the last time her mark had burned like that, one of her team had been inches away from treading on an IED. Cursing, she pulled her boot knife, and loosed her grip on the power crackling beneath her skin.

A second jolt sent a low hum of arousal through her system, and she hissed as the taste of the power registered. Guilt followed quickly on the heels of hunger as she sheathed the blade. Opening the door of the bathroom, she stalked out, the power dancing through her hair, to find her lover blushing.

The power Fee had barely been keeping contained lashed out without her conscious control and Becker flinched. Jess stepped towards her fearlessly but Fee was focused on Becker who was now pulling together a rudimentary shield.

"I should skin you for touching her, Hilary; pour out your blood as an offering to Her, and give your bones back to the land. It would be so very easy to do - the oath to protect the land that your family has apparently been making for generations would make you the perfect sacrifice." Jess touched Fee’s bare arm gently and the hunger she had stamped down rose with startling speed.

Fee pulled Jess into a kiss and poured the power riding her into it, pushing away the taste of Becker's power and the oath his family had bred into their blood. Jess returned the kiss with interest, pouring the tangle of her desires back into her lover. Fee broke the kiss with a feral smile, the power still crackling just beneath her skin. She cupped Jess' cheek in her hand and pushed as much power as she dared into her as she dragged their bodies closer, lips slanting together again.

For a moment, Becker just stood there watching, appraising, and trying hard to ignore the desire stirring inside of him at the sight of them both. He’d always been attracted Fee, even if he chose not to act on it. Something about the primal nature of her had caught him from day one. And Jess, well, the brightness wrapped up within the tiny woman, its sheer antithesis to his own view of the world, had captivated him. If Fee hadn’t quite obviously laid prior claim to her, Becker probably would have given his attraction to her more serious consideration. Together though, the two of them positively glowed in a way that he could never hope to achieve. It left him deeply longing and more aware of his solitude than he’d been for many years.

Becker shook himself like a dog, realizing that he was starting to be able to see the physical manifestation of all that extra power as Fee kissed Jess breathless, and the energy continued to rise around them with no sign of dissipating. With a deep breath and serious concerns for his own sanity, he reached out and placed one hand on Fee’s shoulder and the other on Jess’. While he’d hoped to break them apart he had absolutely no warning for what happened next. Every nerve in his body short-circuited as some of that immense power he’d seen chose him as the path of least resistance. Becker could feel it slithering through his blood, tasting and connecting, before choosing to sink back into the earth where it belonged through the soles of his boots. He would have collapsed when it departed if Fee and Jess hadn’t each quickly slipped an arm about his waist.

“You’re an idiot, Hils, you know that?” Fee muttered disparagingly as they led him to sit down. “That has to have been almost as stupid as the time you challenged the drill sergeant to best two out of three on the mats.”

“It might have been incredibly stupid of him,” Jess considered from his other side, “but it looks like he’s found a solution to your problem, love.”

Jess reached out to stroke her fingertips gently across Fee’s wrist where the goddess’ geas marked her lover. She flinched as the power rose quickly to claim her, walking fire up Jess’ arm before she pulled quickly away. Cautious Jess took up one of Becker’s long fingered hands and threaded it with her own. Turning their linked hands palm up, Jess wordlessly offered them to Fee. When Fee added her hand to theirs the rush she felt was one of sudden balance, of power finally completing its circuit. What she received in return wasn’t the nearly mind-blowing hunger that had gripped her previously but a pleasant warmth and homecoming. Mindful that this entire experience was a bit like playing spin the bottle with a live grenade Jess removed her hand, leaving Becker with Fee’s alone. She looked curiously from one to the other.

“Well,” she asked a little fearfully, “are you able to shed power if I’m not in the middle any more?”

Becker gave Fee’s hand a gentle squeeze before letting go. She turned toward her lover with hunger in her eyes.

“No, baby girl. The power’s not rising the way it does when it’s just you and I, but it doesn’t dissipate either.”

“So why does it take all three for you to be able to ground the extra power you’ve been carrying?” Jess wondered aloud.

“My guess,” Becker offered, “her geas is linked to you, not me, so it won’t voluntarily touch me. With you in the middle to act as a conduit, the geas finds the path to my family’s oath, one bound to the earth itself, a place to go to ground.”

Fee nodded unsteadily, still trying to come down from the release of that much power.

“Hils, how did I miss an oath of that magnitude when we were back at Sandhurst?"

"At the time, my father was the oldest member of our family line still serving. Until I was sent to Afghanistan he bore the majority of the oath’s burden. It settled on me more fully after my first kill, and completely when I took command."

“It’s got one hell of a kick to it. Exactly how long has your family been swearing and upholding that oath?”

“That we have records for; six generations, on both lines. Family legends – at least a quarter of a millennia, probably longer. Change of subject; how long have you been bearing a protector’s geas for your goddess?”

“Since my parents died. I was 16, still living in the States, and had to turn emancipated minor to get custody of my younger sister. I felt like I couldn’t do it all on my own, so I threw up a plea to the goddess and she accepted.”

“And when did your geas wrap itself around our field co-ordinator, Fee?”

"She handed me a weapon, I ended up taking her to bed, and at some point that evening she kissed the mark, and it shifted - I'm fairly sure it would block a bullet for her, but I don't think I can use it to protect the men and women under my command the way I did while in enemy territory.”

Becker understood finally why Fee had been willing to take the permanent assignment to the ARC. Falling in love with the ARC’s field co-ordinator had been her undoing as a soldier. Without the protection her geas had offered, bomb hunting in the fields of Afghanistan would likely have been a death sentence.

“So your geas won’t let you use Jess to ground, because its focus is to shelter her.”

Fee nodded mutely, frustrated at herself for having not seen it sooner. She knew she hadn’t been thinking clearly lately, but the degree to which that was the case hadn’t been evident until now.

Becker touched the mark on her wrist recognizing it as one of the Ogam, letters in an ancient alphabet from early medieval Ireland.

"Fearn, as the binder? Did you choose the symbolism yourself, Fee?"

Fee nodded firmly. She'd known damned well what she was choosing at the time and still didn't regret it

"Why would it matter, Hils?"

"It's one of the Ogam with multiple meanings. I'm guessing the shift where it focused on Jess was a shift in its nature?"

"From what I can feel, yes," Fee responded cautiously, still not seeing where he was headed with the line of questioning. "I really can't say that I've tested the limits of it since it shifted its focus."

“Fee, she's your heart. Even Lester can see that. And you can't use your geas in the field the same way. You've stood between her and serious danger how many times in the last six months?"

Fee shut her eyes briefly. "Too many times Hils, but if she's become central to my geas, then why the hell doesn't her worry over my sanity allow me to override the protection so I can ground?"

"Would my not knowing enough to work with you make any difference?" Jess asked.

"Possibly. I don't think I’ve ever seen someone riding as much power as Fee is. My father was always pretty bad when he returned from field operations but this is an order of magnitude worse. I'm not sure you could hurt her or let her be hurt even if you tried, Fee. And the power riding you aches, doesn't it?”

Fee hung her head. She hated feeling vulnerable but Hilary Becker had known her for far too long not to see straight through the act that had kept everyone else at bay. It did ache. Every single moment felt stretched and twisted, making it hard to breathe, hard to remember what had come the moment before. She'd never been this out of control before and she had no clue how she'd landed herself in this predicament much less how to get out of it. But asking for help was the very last thing she wanted to do. Even from someone like Hilary Becker. Especially from someone like Hilary Becker.

Jess reached in front of Becker to cup Fee's cheek. Fee simply leaned into the touch, trying desperately to use it to keep herself focused on the present moment. But the present was a slippery thing and she was quickly becoming exhausted from trying to keep herself pulled together.

"Fee, love, please don't shut us out. I'm no good at this and you and I together have been barely keeping a lid on it for more than a week. What's it going to be like when you get even closer to the full moon? He won't hurt you; you know that. Becker would never hurt either of us," Jess said, turning to face Becker so he could see the conviction in her eyes and the warning challenge there that he'd better not make a liar of her.

"We can try, kitten," Fee sounded resigned.

Jess let out a whoosh of breath, relieved that with her mania temporarily tamed Fee was willing to listen to reason. She stood, and pulled Fee to her feet.

"I think this conversation might be easier had at my flat."

"Why don't you two go get things sorted out?" Becker said, trying to give them space. "I'll head home and we can talk about this when you're ready."

"Like hell you will," Jess snapped back. "I'm not going through one more day with Fee riding this close to the edge of sanity. If you can help us get her down from here, we're going to figure that out right now." Her tone brooked no argument.

Becker raised his hands in placation. "Your flat, then Jess."

"That's better," she replied. “Besides, you're in no shape to drive"

Becker looked at his own hands held out before him and realized Jess was right. He was shaking.  



	4. Hieros Gamos Kentros - Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Big big thanks to [](http://jooles34.livejournal.com/profile)[**jooles34**](http://jooles34.livejournal.com/) for the beta service!

Turning, she exited the bar, Fee and Becker both trailing her. The ride to her flat was a short one and the block of flats they led him into was far more upmarket than he had expected from either woman. He knew Fee was in private hirings; he must have said something out loud because Jess answered him.

"I come from money, Becker. When my parents heard I was taking a job in London, they insisted on buying me a decent flat, but they went a little overboard," Jess hit the button for the top floor, more than a little embarrassed.

She let them into an open airy spacious living area that was both modern and retro. Looking around, Becker noted how well it represented Jess’ tastes. But he could also see bits of Fee around the space if he looked carefully. A leather motorcycle jacket hung beside Jess’ more feminine wool car coat. A pile of books on the coffee table which looked more like history and philosophy, which Becker didn’t think Jess had interest in. Jess took their coats and motioned them over to the sofa and chair. Once they’d both settled, she perched on the sofa’s arm to Fee’s right.

"Becker, exactly how exhausted are you?"

He laughed, but Fee nudged him in the ribs and glared, waiting for a reply.

"I feel like I just ran selection again - but I can stay awake a little longer. Why?"

"I want to try a little experiment." Fee replied tiredly, but with a gleam in her eye that he knew meant she was thinking again.

Linking hands with Jess, she coaxed the energy crackling under her skin to the surface, and kissed his cheek. With more thought, and more control behind the grounding, he could still feel the wildness of her geas running through him, but his oath didn't rise in answer. Instead it felt like something he'd been missing for years. The power he'd expected was still there, but it was controlled, channeled. He could taste something underneath it, something he knew he should recognize but which he couldn't quite place.

Curious, Becker reached out to clasp Jess' other hand.

And his oath rose, wrapping itself around the power Fee was feeding him. He could feel both of them. Fee, scared and frustrated, and Jess' concern - for both of them?

Letting himself sink deeper, down beneath the obvious, he probed gently, looking more closely at the connections between them all.

"Fee, can you actually look at the way we're connecting right now? Tell me what you see?"

He knew what he thought he was seeing but he needed confirmation.

"Where the hell are all the extra channels going?" Fee wondered as she looked closely at the thin connection they'd forged.

"Hell if I know," Becker replied grimly. "You don't know?"

"No," Fee flashed back in irritation, "I'd thought all of my geas was focused on Jess. I had no idea there was anything else. Do you really think I would have left it hanging like this if I'd known?"

“Fee, how many had you stretched your geas to cover in theatre?”

“I ended up in command of my detachment, so twelve EOD operators, and my support personnel – we came back with all thirty so I guess I was covering all of them.”

Becker winced.

"Twelve EOD operators, Fee? What the hell were you thinking?"

"I was thinking that I wanted everyone to survive their tour to make it home to their families," she ground out. "And they were my responsibility. I was on leave trying to sort myself out when I got dragged into this mess."

"By yourself or were you working with someone to get that sorted?" Becker asked pointedly.

She pulled Jess into her lap. "On my own," she admitted. "It was the reason I was up there in the first place."

"Who the bloody hell in command thought it was a good idea to leave a munitions expert on her own when sorting out her head?" Becker was furious.

"We'd done decompression, and I was using my own leave before my next posting. Which was supposed to be a nice quiet post at Sandhurst."

Jess meeped.

Fee kissed her.

"I promise I won't get mad, kitten, but what did you do?"

“I might have changed your orders a bit," Jess mumbled.

Becker held his breath waiting for Fee to blow her temper, but it never came.

Fee laughed softly. "I'm actually quite grateful, Jess. That post at Sandhurst would have driven me mad. But why?"

"They didn't need you, we did. Ryan had just been laid up. We were short-staffed. And competence was in very short supply. I was grasping at straws."

"What ever happened to no private hacking?" Becker muttered under his breath. Jess shot him a dirty look.

"Lay off, Hilary. You said it yourself when you came across me on the moor; you needed all the help you could get."

Becker put his hands up deprecatingly. Arguing with Fee was generally a losing proposition. Unless you were Jess, and even she failed occasionally.

"And I was very grateful to get you."

Jess smiled, yawned, and then leaned into Fee for another kiss.

"My spare bed is made up, Becker." She stood, and sashayed away, snickering softly as she watched them both in a wall mirror.

Fee rose from her seat on the sofa, and gestured towards a door. "Spare bed is through there."

"Thanks," Becker replied tiredly. He rose unsteadily, waiting for a moment as his equilibrium settled down.

“For the record Fee, if you EVER let something like this get out of hand again, I will personally hunt you down and drain you so dry, you won’t qualify as anything more than null for at least a week."

Fee nodded. "I have no intention of letting it get this bad again."

"Again shouldn't even be a part of that sentence," Becker snapped, letting just a little bit of his frustration and power lash out at her.

Fee stamped down on the urge to snarl. "Understood, Sir."

"Good night."

Fee watched as Becker walked stiffly to the spare room and closed the door behind him. She knew he was right, but that didn't make it any easier to swallow. Tired beyond reason, she turned toward the room she shared with Jess. Jess was already changed, and curled under the covers on their bed.

"Kitten, are you alright?'"

Jess didn't reply. Fee shed her clothing and pulled on an over large shirt. She crawled into bed beside Jess, and gently put a finger beneath her chin.

"Come on, baby girl. You've got to tell me what's wrong."

Jess shut her eyes briefly. "I'm afraid I'll lose you to him. He's your equal in ways I can't be."

"Come again?" Fee looked at her with confusion.

Jess sighed.

"He's so much more than I could ever be."

"Oh, baby girl." She kissed Jess softly.

"I'll understand if this is what you want, "Jess said, withdrawing carefully.

"Jess, sweetheart, Becker is an old friend, but you're the one I've fallen in love with."

"But-" Jess started, but Fee gently placed a finger over her lips.

"No, hear me out. Hilary and I could have tried each other on for size any time in the years we've known one another. Why would I suddenly decide to now?"

"The way you look at him changed tonight. There's hunger now, and he can ground you - I can't." Jess hated herself for the petulant tone in her voice.

"He can act as a ground, but without you, it doesn't work, remember? It takes all three of us-" Fee broke off in astonishment at what she'd just said. Could it possibly be that simple?

"Fee?" Jess looked at her lover, questioningly.

Fee didn't respond. After what Jess had just said, could she really ask this of her? She loved the woman with all her heart. Nothing that would break her would ever be worth doing, especially with her geas wrapped around them both.

“You've thought of something, love. We promised not to keep secrets from each other."

"You're not going to like this, kitten," Fee warned.

Jess put the clues together, and blushed.

Fee waited for the anger, tears, hurt, but they never came. Instead, Jess just waited expectantly. Finally Fee harumphed and said aloud what they'd both been thinking.

"I'm still not sure why I'm riding this much energy, but until I figure it out, I need to ground, regularly, and Hils is the best way to make that happen. But it takes all three of us. We'd have to invite him in."

Jess shook her head disbelieving. “It'd never work. He'd never accept!"

"I wouldn't be so sure of that," Fee smiled, "I saw the way he was watching you earlier. And I felt the arousal he was riding when he touched you with his power in the bar."

Fee could feel a spike of arousal from Jess. She chuckled softly.

"You like that idea, baby girl - that Hils is attracted to both of us?" Jess bit her lip and nodded fractionally. Fee shifted, and kissed her, slipping a hand under her top, and pulling her closer, her other hand drifting lower, skimming her hip.

“I think he’d be fascinated by you, kitten.” The hand dipped lower, and Jess shivered. “I think he’d treat you like a precious porcelain doll to start with, so careful and controlled, afraid of hurting you - but just think what he'd look like laid out beneath you."

Jess blushed and squirmed. Fee chuckled and slid down the bed, pushing the duvet back with her, and settling between Jess' legs.

"Or imagine him doing this to you." She licked a broad strip, and then circled her clit with the tip of her tongue. Looking up Jess' body, she smiled, and slipped two fingers into her cunt. Jess whimpered, and Fee crooked her fingers and sucked hard on her clit, trying to drive her over the edge into orgasm. She pushed a spark of power through her tongue, and Jess arched her back, and screamed soundlessly. Fee slid back up the bed and kissed her deeply, but when Jess tried to return the favour, she shook her head.

"Not now; in the morning, baby girl. I have an idea..."

The wicked smile on Fee’s mouth was all Jess needed to know that she was going to thoroughly enjoy the following morning.


	5. Hieros Gamos Kentros - Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Becker doesn't realize it, but he's just been ensnared in a trap partly of his own making. But oh what a delightful trap it turns out to be!

The next morning, Hilary Becker woke to the sun in his eyes. He lay still for a moments in bed, giving himself the rare luxury of waking slowly. He could hear the murmur of voices through the wall from Jess’ room. Jess was giggling and Fee’s voice was low and breathless. Without really thinking about it, he listened more closely, trying to make out words, discern conversation. Fee gasped, moaned, and suddenly he was sitting bolt upright in bed, eyes wide as he heard the whine of a vibrator and Fee’s wordless keening as Jess talked her through her orgasm.

He was hopelessly aroused by the sound of the two women in the next room. Drawn to it, he could feel the rising tide of power spiraling outward as Fee peaked and orgasmed for a second time. His balls tightened in sympathy as Becker stumbled out of bed and into the bathroom next door. He’d never been a voyeur before and he wasn’t about to start now, no matter how much it was turning him on. He turned the taps on cold and stepped under the spray, shivering as it hit his warm skin.

Becker stood under the water, eyes closed, trying to calm himself down. The energy was still there, completely raw and unshielded, drawing him in like the promise of warmth at a brightly burning hearth. Muttering curses under his breath, he gave in to impulse and let his hand wander lower, long callused fingers wrapping firmly around his cock. His shoulder rested against the wall of the shower his head thrown back in the shower’s spray. Fire spread across his nerve endings as his hands slid tightly down the length of his hardened penis. He gasped, a word buried somewhere among the shallow breaths as he came closer to his climax. The intensity of the sensation burned as Becker felt Fee’s energy rising again down the hall in shared pleasure. Feeling her climax coming yet again Becker slid down the wall as the first spasm pulled his body taught.

When he could no longer stop his teeth chattering from the cold, Becker turned off the taps and got out of the shower. He stood quietly for a moment before the bathroom mirror, extending his senses to see whether things had finally calmed down between Jess and Fee. What he sensed was a contentment and intimacy that made him feel colder than the shower he’d just taken.

Becker yanked his clothing back on and stalked off to the kitchen to rummage around for some coffee. As he looked through the cupboards, he felt more than heard Fee join him. Exhaling noisily, he turned around to face her only to be struck speechless by the sight of her. Hair tousled and skin flushed, she was an incredible study in arousal, her fair skin contrasting with her red hair and the rich emerald green of her robe.

“Looking for the coffee?” she asked in a sleepy voice.

“Yeah,” he replied, turning back to the cupboards so she could no longer see his expression.

Becker almost flinched when she reached around him to the second shelf of the cupboard to his right. He could feel Fee’s warm well muscled body lean against his as she reached down the coffee and the mugs. She placed them both on the worktop before him then turned away to fill the kettle.

"Hils, I have this place so heavily shielded I can feel any energy flow within it. I know you could feel us,” Fee told him.

He was NOT going to have this conversation with her. Becker turned away to go get the kettle. She stepped into his path, the top of her dressing gown gaping slightly.

"Hils, we knew you could feel us,"

“Fee, you're not thinking rationally," he snapped, back still turned.

She laughed. "Hils, can't you see where we're heading?" Her hand brushed the back of his as she reached for one of the steaming mugs.

"I can see where you want to go and I have no intention of following. Fee, you have something incredible with Jess and the last thing I want to do is ruin that for either of you. Don't be stupid. Don't throw this away."

"And if Jess wanted this as well, would that make a difference to you? I could feel the way you reached out to us earlier," She sipped her coffee. "The idea of sharing a bed with both of us appeals to her, and at the moment we need you, Hils."

"There are other ways to get you grounded, Fee. Mucking up our friendship, our working relationship, and what you and Jess have with each other is not the answer."

"Hils, what in the goddess' name did you think I was trying to do last week? The only thing that was even touching the power I am carrying was blood and sex. I doubt you want me to carve my way through the squadron, or start playing with explosives on a call-out. A single, chaste touch brought me closer to grounded than I'd been since the last full moon."

He gave her a serious considering look. He'd noticed that she was playing a bit rougher with the boys than strictly necessary of late and he knew now that Jess haggard appearance was in part due to Fee's voracious need. But falling into bed with him? It still seemed like a very poorly considered plan to him. Even if Fee wasn't thinking clearly enough to see that, he still could.

"Fee, you're just not being reasonable," he said again with a shake of his head.

"Hils, I'm closer to rational than I have been in weeks. What do I have to do to convince you?"

"Do you honestly think you can prove to me that this won't change things? That it won't ruin what you already have?"

She coaxed one of the loose strands of her geas into connecting to him and he shivered. "Of course it'll change things, Hilary, but Jess and I are agreed that we want to take the chance. We don't think the changes will be a bad thing."

Becker didn't reply as he tried to build a shield strong enough to keep her out. "Either you clamp down on that power right now, or we're done talking about this. I will NOT be coerced, Fee."

Her laugh was intoxicating. "Anyone would think you'd had a bad experience with someone, Hils. I spent eighteen months tied to every member of my squadron - are you really suggesting I slept with any or all of them? I was just checking something." She pulled her geas back under her skin.

"Leave it alone, Fee. And what exactly were you checking?"

"I felt your reaction when you checked in on us earlier. It surprised both of us. I wondered what had caused it - I was just checking it wasn't a spell form."

Becker brushed the comment aside, still unwilling to let go of the argument.

"Look, how I reacted to overhearing you two was just poor manners on my part. I'm sorry. I should have had more self control than that. But it doesn't change anything. Even if I were attracted to one or both of you, I would never act on it."

Fee sighed, and leaned in to brush a kiss on his closed mouth. "Hilary, I deliberately didn't shield this morning - and Jess suggested it. I hadn't realised how strongly we'd affect you, but that may be because the fantasy Jess used to bring me off this morning involved you. We both want you, and damn the consequences."

Becker didn't reply and as Jess entered the room Fee knew exactly why. She'd felt rather similarly herself the first time she'd seen Jess fresh from the shower. There was something about the way the tiny woman looked, hair wet and curling gently around her face. And the short yukata kimono she wore as a dressing gown left little to the imagination.

"She's beautiful, isn't she?" Fee whispered from beside him. "I felt the same the first time I saw her like this."

Blithely ignoring them both, Jess hummed quietly under her breath as she set the kettle back on the stove and gathered together what she needed to make a cup of tea.

"Hils, she knew you were out here."

"Damnit, that's just playing dirty," he complained, but she could tell that he'd lost some of the fight which had been in his voice just a few moments earlier.

Jess looked over at him from her tea.

"Yes, it is. But if you're not going to listen, then what's a girl to do?" Jess crossed her legs, revealing a slender shapely thigh as the robe shifted around her. She sipped her tea delicately. "So what was your argument, Hilary?" She rolled the r.

Becker tried desperately to think but his brain refused to cooperate. Before he could formulate a response, Jess had put down her tea, walked over to him, and was standing far too close for comfort. Wordlessly, she stretched up on tip toe and brushed a gentle kiss across his lips. Kissing Jess was like kissing spun sugar. Like kissing innocence. There was an edge of something else running through it, and he cupped her cheek, deepening their kiss as he chased the elusive taste. Lips sealed together, he felt more than heard her moan when Fee wrapped her body around Jess from behind.

"She tastes exquisite doesn't she, Hils?" Fee's voice was soft, and he broke the kiss in surprise.

When he tried to speak Fee kissed him instead, until Jess squirmed between them and Fee broke the kiss. Becker's head reeled - Fee's kiss was like kissing danger, trying to embrace a lightening bolt, and she had dominated it, seeking the taste of his power, which rose in reaction, feeding off the obvious arousal of the two women.

Becker looked down at Jess uncertainly. He was still hesitant, despite their obvious show of interest. Would it forever change his relationship with them both? He stood before them both indecision and hunger warring in his expression. Becker looked over Jess’ head, wordlessly asking permission of the woman behind her. Whatever he saw made him chuckle, putting a gentle smile on his face.

“Okay you two, I concede,” he rumbled.

A strong hand from Jess’ other side wrapped around all three of them, pressing Jess deliciously close. Fee’s hips shifted forwards and her arms wrapped across Jess to lightly hold onto Becker’s hips.

“I want this just as much as you do, Hils, I always have.”

Becker hugged them briefly, and indulged in another of Jess' kisses. He was sure that this could become a new form of addiction if given enough time. Though it was the last thing he wanted to do, Becker gently stepped away from the two women. Straightening, he looked at Fee sternly.

"Go get a shower, Fee. We're all due at work soon and I think you've got a good enough lid on it for the moment that continuing this will keep till tonight."

Fee pouted. Becker tried to remain stern, but the look just wouldn't hold.

"Fee, you look ridiculous. No one who knows you would ever believe that pout. Now go get ready for work."

Jess leaned up to kiss her, and then shoved her lover towards their shower.


	6. Chapter 6

Watching on the monitors as Fee set yet another trap for Blade, Becker was beginning to question the wisdom of letting these two particular members of his troop pair off against each other on a training scenario. Fee had come due for training in the rotation and even though she was much more in control than she’d been the previous week most of the company were still giving her a wide berth. Ever the idiot though, Blade had volunteered, claiming with a smile that he’d best her even if she did have raging PMS.

A day ago a comment like that would have landed Blade on his ass before he knew what hit him. Today, however, Becker had just seen an unholy gleam in Fee’s eyes as she shook Blade’s hand and asked him how much he’d wager on that statement. The protection specialist put up the best knife he had on him, while Fee’s end of the bet was a bottle of 15-year-old Speyside scotch. If he’d known then what he knew now, Becker would have called the whole thing off. At this point, there was a higher than usual likelihood of this training exercise ending with one or both parties in the med centre.  
Becker watched as Fee planted yet another improvised explosive device. Unlike the previous one, this time she left the ground scuffed up, not bothering to do a terribly good job of hiding the device. Puzzled, Becker leaned in closer to get a better view. He’d been so absorbed in the exercise that it wasn’t until he was far closer to Jess than was reasonable that he realized how close he’d gotten. Becker heard Jess’ swift inhalation and saw Fee’s head snap up and look straight at the camera.

Seeing Jess duck her head, he murmured, “What’s wrong?”

“You’re distracting the hell out of me and Fee can feel it. By the way, she’s not playing fair; you do know that, right?”

Before Becker had the chance to reply, a shower of dirt in one of the other images on the screen grabbed his attention. It appeared that Blade had just encountered the first of Fee’s little toys. At the other end of the screen, Becker could see Fee tucking something away behind a bush before setting off down the woodland trail yet again. When Blade came trotting round the corner a short while later, Becker held his breath, waiting to see what would happen.

As expected, Blade easily noticed the tracks and signs of tampering which Fee had left behind. With more caution than he’d exercised previously, the hand-to-hand expert approached the improvised bomb. He gave a cocky smirk as he began to carefully remove the dirt surrounding the device. Once he had it exposed, Blade checked it over carefully before deciding on a course of action. He pulled out one of his knives, slid it under a loop of wire connected to the detonator, and tore upwards. No sooner had he cut the wire than something came flying out of the bushes where Fee had been less than five minutes earlier. Blade looked up in complete shock as his clothing was stained a mottled purple and red. Becker roared with laughter then switched his comm back on.

“You’re dead you silly fucker. And I believe you owe that knife to the lady standing behind you.”

On camera they watched Blade whirl around to face Fee. She gave him an indolent smile and waved at the cameras; from her fingers she dangled what appeared to be a lace bra. Becker almost choked on his surprise. He could positively feel Jess humming with arousal and excitement as she watched her lover do one of the things that she did best.

“Oi, captain, is she allowed to use articles of clothing and wild berries to kill me, for god’s sake?”

“The exercise was about improvising with the materials at hand while in enemy territory, Niall. It’s your own bloody fault that you underestimated her.”

Blade shook his head and handed the knife over to Fee with a laugh. As they turned to walk back to their vehicles, Fee deliberately shifted her stance as she walked past the surveillance camera. Her combat jacket swung open for a brief moment revealing that the bra she was no longer wearing had been the only thing she’d had on underneath. Becker and Jess both stared at the screen for a solid minute as their minds ran wild.

~~oOOo~~

Jess had pressed two keys into his hand earlier in the day, and Fee had shot him a smile before he'd left separately, heading for his own flat, to pick up some kit. When he'd arrived at Jess flat, he let himself in to find Fee and Jess curled up together on their sofa. They both looked up at him, with swollen lips that suggested they'd been kissing since they got in. The smiles they both gave him reminded him strongly of a pair of Siamese cats his mother had when he was growing up. Fee wasn't bothering to contain the halo of power surrounding them both; letting it glow faintly like a welcoming fire. Jess gave Fee a gentle nudge and the tall, redheaded captain stalked toward him like the lethally trained expert he knew her to be.

Dropping his bag, he stepped into Fee's movement, and kissed her like she'd kissed him that morning, his own power rising through his skin. Jess laughed softly, and he realised that he must be tasting her lip-gloss on Fee. The thought was far more arousing than he’d expected it to be. Years of training was the only thing that kept him still when he felt the tip of a blade slide under his shirt and start slicing apart the buttons. Fee gave him with a look that was pure sex. And looking over Fee's shoulder, he could see Jess' fingers dipping out of sight.

"You know, Hils, you really shouldn't let me play with the boys like that when I'm already feeling keyed up. It just makes it worse. That knife Blade forfeited will cost a week’s pay to replace."

"His own fault; I warned them all that you were feeling devious but he volunteered to run the course solo."

The blade rested against his skin as he leaned in for another kiss. Hilary slid his hand up between them until he'd managed to wrap it around the hilt of the blade. Fee wasn't quite as distracted as he'd thought and refused to let the blade go. With a wicked smile, she moved it back out of his reach and Jess could see it slide into a sheath at the back of Fee's trousers.

"Naughty, naughty, Hils. That's my new toy." She pulled away slightly.

“Well, until we’ve set some ground rules, I’d rather keep the toys out of this,” he shot back.

Fee pouted at him, but nodded fractionally in agreement. He could see something lurking behind her eyes that he hadn’t been able to place yet. As Fee turned away from him and toward the bedroom, Hilary shot a questioning look at Jess. She looked back at him, puzzled. He offered Jess a hand up from the couch.

“Something’s bothering her. Any idea what?” he asked in a whisper.

“I don’t know, I’ve just been going along with it for the moment, riding it out till we could talk.”

“Do you want me to talk to her or shall we do it together?”

“Together, please” Jess replied with certainty, “whatever this is, it has to do with the three of us and she’s not talking about it to me alone.”

He gave her a warm smile, and continued to hold her hand as she led them toward the bedroom.  
When they entered the bedroom, Fee was sprawled across the bed, half naked and still playing with the knife. She was tracing it across her skin, leaving thin red lines in its wake. And as they crossed the threshold, the energy crackled across their skin, a hungry edge to it.

"Fee," Hilary hissed, a warning in his voice.

Jess sat down on the edge of the bed. She gently wrapped her hand around Fee's and took the knife away. Fee looked at her for a moment, but her eyes were shuttered, refusing to betray her emotions to her lover.

"Please, Fee, you've got to talk to us. If this isn't going to work for us all, then we'll have to find another way. But we've got to know now if you're having second thoughts."

The power rolled in the room, and Fee pulled it partially back under control. Her eyes glittered, but she shook her head.

"I'm not having second thoughts, not really kitten. I'm just …" She looked across at Becker. "You really shouldn't have let me play with Blade today, Sir."

Jess slipped off the bed and tucked the knife into their top drawer. "Fee, you're avoiding the subject," she spoke softly, and Fee laughed.

"Captain Black, I expect a better explanation than that," Becker added. Fee had chosen to address him formally; if the structure of their command was what she needed to be able to speak freely, than he would give it to her.

Fee looked up at him.

"I've lost control, Sir. I'm a danger to myself, the men I command and my lover. I'm afraid to let you both see how fucked I am - the number of ghosts in my head. I'm tired and scared of trying to ride this out."

Jess moved around the bed and sat next to Fee, fingers tangling gently in her hair.

"Captain, I've put up with the erratic behaviour and leaking power for weeks. I've seen how this is taking you apart. Don't you think I've already half suspected the worst? You've got to give me enough to help you out. I'm trained for command. I've seen what can happen to people coming back from theatre. Now either we fix this together or you keep trying to hold on to it by yourself and end up needing a straight-jacket before week's end."

Fee's spine stiffened, and the flow of power peaked and began to pool in the room. She curled into Jess' side as she spoke haltingly.

"I don't know how. I was never supposed to be doing the job I did in theatre. So many deaths I should have been able to prevent. So many faces in my head."

Her eyes snapped open and suddenly Jess and Becker could see a ghost glaring at Fee. Jess brushed a kiss against her cheek and the ghost disappeared in an eddy of power.

"How the fuck, Sir, was I suppose to tell the head-blind fool in Cyprus that I was seeing ghosts?"

Becker shifted to look at the two of them with his other-sight. He could see the geas curling between and around them both now that Jess was touching Fee.

"Captain, I need you to hold it together for just a little longer. Can you do that?" Becker hated to do it, but he put a hard edge of command into his voice, doing his best to invoke Fee's training.

Jess looked at him with concern, but the power in the room steadied and when Fee spoke her voice was a little more under control.

"As you command, Sir."

"Jess, I want you to leave the room. You'll know if something happens. But we need a moment alone."

Jess looked at him with reluctance but, kissing Fee softly, rose from her cross-legged position on the bed, and left the room has he requested. Fee remained curled in on herself doing her best not to cry. Hilary watched Fee as her geas stretched and shifted. He could almost see it spring back to Fee when Jess got far enough away. When it did, suddenly her spine stiffened and the ephemeral outlines of close to a dozen ghosts were crowding the room with them. Eyes screwed tightly shut, Fee sobbed as her power went wild beyond her control yet again. Hilary walked over to the bed and sat down beside her, placing one hand on her head. She instantly curled into his side, seeking the protection and shielding that her geas was no longer providing. As he stroked his hand across her hair, Hilary tried to draw some of the power away from her. It wasn't anything he'd ever been taught, but he wasn't going to leave her like this.

"Don't worry, Fee; I can see them. You're not mad. I promise, we'll get this sorted out. Now that I know, I won't leave you on your own like this."

A little of the stiffness left her, but the energy he was trying to pull from her hissed and crackled under his touch.

"Why did you send Jess away?" Fee sobbed.

"I needed to see what this is doing to you when she's not here to act as a buffer."

Fee's voice had a hysterical edge to it. "Please, Hils."

Her geas stretched and the power was abruptly gone from the room, apart from two strands reaching out. One danced at the edge of his shielding, and the other reached towards where he assumed Jess was.

"Just a moment more," he soothed. He took a deep breath and opened his shields, letting her geas test him out.

It wrapped itself around the anchor of his own power, and a little more of the tension went out of Fee's body - and the crackling bite of the power faded slightly. Hilary had been about to breathe a sigh of relief when the power rushed right back into him.

Something was very wrong here.

Before either of them could react, Jess came charging back into the room.

"I don't know what the hell you're doing, Becker, but it stops right now."

The moment Jess wrapped her arms protectively around her lover the crackling fire that had coursed across his skin disappeared as if it had never existed. Looking at them together, Hilary could see Fee's geas entwining between and around them yet again.

"Fee, have you always seen them at this time of year, or was there a starting point?"

She sat up finally, rolling her shoulders as some of the tension was released now that Jess was there again to keep the world at bay.

"I've known they were there for the past decade; particularly as we get closer to Samhain each year. But this is the first time it’s been this bad, this personal. I first saw them after my sister died. I'd taken the geas to protect her, but it twisted and shifted once she was gone. The geas changed again when I went out on deployment; helped me cover my troops in theatre. But then I came home, and I met Jess, and well…” she let the sentence trail off at the forgone conclusion.

“What’s changed?” Hilary asked astutely.

“I have,” Fee replied.

Jess leant in and kissed her briefly.


	7. Chapter 7

Jess leant in and kissed Fee briefly.

"I recognise them now,” Fee explained. “They have names and families, and deaths I could have ... no, should have, prevented. My OC, and Sgt Major; the two civilians we lost to the raptors last week - and it makes them harder to ignore. The guilt feeds into the loop, and the more power I’m carrying, the more they manifest."

Hilary nodded his understanding.

“And your parents? Your sister?” he asked quietly.

Fee nodded and drew in a shaking breath. Arms still wrapped around her lover, Jess stroked her hand comfortingly up and down Fee’s spine. Finally someone knew the worst of it; someone who would understand. Fee sent a silent prayer to her goddess, hoping he’d be able to help.

"Unless there's something worse that you haven't told me, I think that Jess was right last night; we need to get you safely grounded. Why it takes all of us is beyond me. But if you both need and want me, I'm willing."

Fee nodded, and Jess reached a hand across to him. The power rose, and Hilary’s oath rose in reply. As they completed the circuit and Fee's back arched, her mouth open in a silent scream.

"Let go, let go!" Jess screamed as she backed off the bed and out of Fee's reach.

Hilary followed her lead, leaving Fee shivering and alone on the bed once again.

“What the hell was that?" Jess snapped at Hilary.

He panted for a moment as he tried to pull his ragged shielding back into place.

"There was no control on that. Absolutely none. Fee? Can you get back enough control for this or are we in serious trouble here?"

Fee was shaking like a leaf, but nodded. "Give me a moment."

Fee's hand wrapped around the necklace talisman she wore at the hollow of her throat. The power surged briefly before she appeared to regain control. Jess moved closer and pulled her lover into a tight hug. Becker stepped forward to join Jess in surrounding Fee. He leaned down to kiss Fee and felt her begin to feed power carefully out through her geas, using Jess as a conduit to reach him. Jess moaned and his breathing shifted, but Fee's control held. He allowed the energy to loop back through them all, not feeling nearly as guilty about the arousal that rose with it.

For a while, Hilary put everything he had into simply kissing Fee and riding the tide of power. He’d longed to indulge in this for such a very long time but had always chosen not to, preferring not to risk both their careers and a friendship he couldn’t bear to lose. Where her kisses that morning had been wild and dominating, now they were a gentle exploration; tasting his mouth, feeling the lush texture of his lips, capturing the noises he made. It was sensual in a way he’d always fantasised that she would be and that only served to arouse him further.

When he finally pulled back for a moment to breathe, Hilary couldn’t help smiling at the sight presented before him. Eyes closed, Fee was relaxed and calm now in the circle made between his body and Jess’ arms. Her lips were still moist from his kisses and a smile flitted about the corners. He gave in to his impulse and swooped back in to coax the tiny smile out of hiding by kissing her again. When he could feel the bow of her mouth curling beneath his own, he backed away once more. Fee remained content and quiescent in their grasp and Hilary could feel the carefully held undercurrent of her power thrumming through the apartment.

“Do you think you can keep it under control now?” he asked quietly.

Fee nodded loosely and he realised from the glazed look when she opened her eyes that the power she was still holding back was having a narcotic effect. Chuckling, he looked around Fee at Jess, who was watching intently. Through the interconnection of Fee’s geas and his own power, he could feel Jess’ tender concern and sharp excitement. Giving her hand a quick squeeze he then mutely began to pull his shirt up over his head. Jess unknotted her wrap dress and let it slide from her shoulders to pool on the bed behind her. Hilary stilled a moment to look appreciatively at Jess’ tiny body, clad now in nothing but a ruby red bra and knickers. Smirking beneath his watchful gaze, she reached forward to unbutton Fee’s combat trousers, but was met by his surprisingly slender fingered hands.

“Please,” Hilary whispered, “let me.”

Still cradled soothingly between them both, Fee remained still and serene. Hilary suspected it was the first time she’d been relaxed in weeks. He was glad to see the manic, feral edge had been blunted already, though he worried a bit that she was being too pliant.

Jess' hands slipped lightly up Fee's body, caressing softly and lovingly as Hilary coaxed her into lifting her hips for him to slide her combats down slender well toned legs. He worked quickly to unlace her boots tossing them aside along with her socks and trousers.

He felt Fee’s breath hitch as his hands skimmed back up her body. Looking upward he was treated to the delirious sight of Jess kissing Fee breathless. The redheaded captain was so distracted by her lover that she paid him no attention, allowing him to feather a trail of kisses across her abdomen as he removed her knickers.

Jess looked up at him with reddened lips and a predatory gleam in her eye. She shifted around from behind Fee, and her lover seized the opportunity to take the nipple of one lush lace covered breast in her mouth. Jess moaned her approval.

For a moment Hilary sat back to watch in stunned and speechless arousal. They were beautiful together, the tiny coordinator and the tall red haired captain he'd gone through Sandhurst with. If any of his men had claimed to have been in this bed, he'd have laughed. He was still fairly certain this was all just a dream, but fuck; they were hot together. He couldn’t suppress the rush of what the sight did to him.

Fee looked up at him again and he was relieved to see that some of the dazed complacency was gone from her expression. He could feel her wordlessly draw from his arousal, feed it into the multi-stranded tangle of their combined power. In return he received a layered and complicated energy that was far more controlled than he’d dared to hope. Acceptance, sensuality, tenderness, and love all wrapped around him in a complicated knot-work. He could no longer tell which emotions were originally his own and which belonged to the two women before him. He wasn’t ready yet to think too closely about what it meant; about the fact they all fit together so easily.

He watched them for a moment longer, then ran a single finger from the bridge of Fee's foot to her knee and then higher. A delicate shiver followed his movement, and he repeated it, pressing a little harder. Hilary smiled as he rose gracefully to sit opposite Jess on Fee's other side.

"Show me what she likes," he asked in a low-voiced whisper.

Jess nodded and smiled, leaning across Fee to kiss him gently. Fee's fingers gently stroked both of their hips as she watched from between them. Jess broke the kiss, and Hilary mirrored her touches as she petted and coaxed sounds from Fee, rolling a nipple between her fingers, stroking the underside of her breast and following her curves. Jess curled her fingers to lightly rake her nails across Fee's ribs, gaining a hiss of pleasure in response. Hilary smirked as he held up his hands to show the short cut nails. He leaned down though and repeated the gesture on the other side using a wet mouth and teeth.

Fee arched her back and he sucked gently on the skin above her navel. She gasped, her hands bunching in the duvet. Jess chuckled, and her fingers drifted lower. Hilary went completely still as he watched Jess' hands drift lazily across Fee's inner thigh. She writhed and wriggled, trying to get Jess back to where she wanted. Each time Jess would move away brought another frustrated whimper from Fee. Hillary slid his hands downward to stroke and sooth the tender skin of her hip, her thigh, the back of her knee.

Jess looked at him and smirked. Her fingers worked a little higher, and Fee relaxed fractionally as Jess stroked her mons. Hilary followed her lead, and Fee almost keened at the sensation of two very different pairs of hands touching her. As his hand slid across her closed nether lips again, he could feel the slippery moisture of her arousal. Hilary couldn't suppress a groan at the feeling of his palm, damp with Fee's juices. Jess sat back on her haunches, and watched as Hilary explored her lover's folds. He couldn't stop the growl he let loose as he slid his fingers possessively across her clit.

Fee shivered beneath his touch and Jess laughed quietly on her other side. He slid one long finger smoothly between her folds and Fee tried to push up towards it with a dirty moan. Hilary's eyes snapped up to connect with Jess' and she stopped mid laugh. He was entirely focused, his brown eyes almost black with arousal, as he finally slipped the tips of two fingers inside Fee's wet heat.

"What do you want Fee? Tell me how you want us to make you come," he demanded as his fingers slid with aching slowness into her body.

Fee raised her head enough to catch his eyes. "Want to feel you, Hils. Want the rush of power across my skin as you slide inside me.”

Jess sat back to watch them, her fingers dancing across the parts of their bodies she could reach. Hilary slid a little further down the bed, and applied his tongue to Fee’s clit.

"Fuck. Hils, I need you to fuck me."

He swiped his tongue down the length of her once more before looking up with lust-darkened eyes.

"Oh don't worry, Fiona, I will," he replied, "but not until you're begging for it."

She slammed her head back into a pillow, and hissed, "Bastard."

"Not the last time I checked," he quipped back before burying his head between her legs once again.

He pushed two fingers back into her heat, curled them, and felt her inner muscles clench hard.

"Mmmm," Jess sighed, "she's always loves that."

Fee whimpered as her back arched, drawing his fingers farther into her body and his mouth more firmly onto her clit. Jess watched the incredible sight of them both for a moment more before pressing her mouth to Fee’s to capture the filthy little noises she was making. Hilary stroked his fingers in and out again, pressing up against the feel of his tongue on Fee's clit as she rocked her hips in time with him.

He could feel the energy barely contained beneath them all. The closer Fee got to the edge, the less she seemed to be consciously in control. When the reins of all that power slipped out of her grasp, he wanted to make sure they were intertwined enough that it had somewhere safe to go. None of them could afford for this to backfire on them. While he didn’t know a lot about the subject, he did know that to lose control was to hazard Fee being consumed, burnt out by all that power. The prospect was terrifying.

Jess tapped his shoulder and his hands stopped, pulling a whine from Fee.

"It doesn’t seem to take much right now. She’s going to come unless you ease up."

Fee shot Jess a dirty look, ”But I want to come, kitten. I want him to fuck me. Fingers or cock, I don’t much care right now."

Hilary's eyes closed for a moment as he fought to calm himself down, to remind himself that there was more than just sex at stake here. He slipped off the bottom of the bed and removed his combats as Jess kissed Fee with languorous sensuality. When he climbed back up to join them, Jess's hand wrapped around his cock, and stroked him from tip to root, before lining him up with Fee's entrance. His hips bucked without permission at her touch and his oath flared, feeding power into the complex web surrounding them. With a guttural shout, they were clinging to each other, Jess wrapped behind Fee kissing and biting, as their bodies moved together to establish a single rhythm. One of Jess' arms wrapped around their hips, clutching at Hilary's arse, while on the other side she slid a hand between their bodies to rub at Fee's over-sensitive clit.

Fee keened and her power crested as she shattered and came, dragging Hilary over the edge with her. Hilary's back arched tight as the flow of power shot through him raw and strong. He almost collapsed when it all surged back up through the point where their bodies joined and then out into the flat around them. The energy crackled through the air momentarily before grounded into Fee's wardings leaving them all panting, wrapped around each other on the bed.  
Jess was the first of the three to move, breathing a sigh of relief as she realised Fee felt much less power-prickly. She slid out of her position, and pulled off her knickers. Fee and Hilary separated, and watched her avidly. There was still a hunger deep inside both their gazes that said that they were far from done with this. As one, they tugged her back down onto the bed, and her eyes nearly rolled back in her head as Fee started to return the earlier favour.

Fee's mouth was possessive but so was Hilary's as they both latched onto her breasts. She purred with pleasure, as their competitive streaks pushed them both to drive her higher. Fee flowed up Jess' body and kissed her soundly, before whispering in her ear. Jess nodded, and Fee smirked before pushing Hilary onto his back. He looked at them slightly wide-eyed as Fee curled her hand around him. His back arched as Fee shot a thread of power through his system and brought him back to a painfully hard state. Hilary hissed at the edge of pain with the pleasure, but Jess licked her lips and he knew that he would do anything to get that mouth back on his body again. Fee grinned wickedly, and then Jess was kissing him delicately.

"Don't toy with me, you two," he growled.

"Now who's begging, Hils?" Fee taunted him.

Jess straddled his thighs and impaled herself slowly on his length and then met his eyes.

"We're only teases if we don't follow through," she grinned as she rolled her hips.

Fee knelt beside her and Jess leant her head back for a kiss. Fee broke the kiss, and coaxed Jess into slow movements that left him bucking his hips beneath her.

With the tiny woman cradled across the saddle of his hips he sat up to draw Fee in close behind, making a sandwich of them all with Jess between. Hilary kissed his way across Jess' collarbone to capture Fee's lips.

"Somehow I doubt the Sergeant Major in our first term would have expected this of us."

Fee laughed, a rich throaty sound that Hilary and Jess realised neither of them had heard in more than a month.

"We were a little competitive, weren't we?"

"And that's changed?" he asked with an eyebrow cocked downward to the tiny woman panting her way to orgasm between them.

"Well, we did learn to cooperate during that sailing trip."

"Dear god if you two don't shut up and bring me off soon, I'm going to find that knife and do you both in!"

They both laughed again and Fee slipped a hand between them as Hilary added a twist to his thrusts. She gave Hilary an impish look and suddenly he could feel the power streaming toward him like a tidal wave. It crested, centring down into his groin as he bucked his hips once more and came with a shout. Jess sobbed her own release against his chest and behind her Hilary could feel Fee carefully pull the power back in and shed it off safely through the root of his oath. His cock twitched once more in sympathy as the power left and the room fell silent and still.

Fee yawned suddenly, and an inexorable urge to sleep spread through the energy woven around them, catching Hilary unaware. Jess snuggled into his chest in a way that was too endearing for words. Despite his best intentions, he found that he couldn't have resisted if he tried; he was suddenly just as tired as they were and damn the consequences to come the next

morning. Reaching out through the lattice of power that floated below them like a safety net, Hilary could feel a level of tranquil stability that hadn't been there before.

With a wide yawn, Fee nudged them both down as she slid bonelessly onto her side. Jess slid down into the warmth of Fee's embrace and Becker, still intimately entwined, couldn't help but follow. Fee succumbed to her body's urge to sleep, and her tiredness dragged both of them into the realm of dreams.


	8. Chapter 8

Fee shifted in her sleep, nuzzling her head in beneath Jess’ chin and flinging an arm across her lover’s body to touch Hilary’s warm solid bulk on the other side of the bed.

"They are a good match for you, Fiona. Take care, you need them both."

Hilary unconsciously moved closer to the small body curled in to his chest. His hand shared a place on Jess’ hip fingers entwined with another’s just as gun callused as his own.

"I knew I'd find them for you Hilary. Don’t muck it up this time."

Arm draped loosely across Fee’s waist, back pressed against the firm warmth of Hilary’s chest, Jess slept deeply, cocooned between them both.

"They both love you Jess, really love you. And your daughter ..."

~~oOOo~~  
Hilary opened his eyes, disoriented by the sensation of a warm body at his front, and the sight of long hair splayed out before him on a strange pillow. Memories of the previous evening rushed back, and he stiffened reflexively before trying to roll out of bed.

"Don't," Jess whispered, grasping his wrist before he could get any farther away from her tiny body curled into the circle of his arms. "If she wakes to find you gone, it will tear her apart. And I know you'd never want that."

Hilary forced his body to relax again, letting his hand rest back on Jess' stomach where she laced their fingers together.

"She's safe again, Jess. You've gotten what you needed. I don't belong here."

Jess was quiet for a moment, thinking before she replied.

"You've always cared for her; I can see that in the way you look at her. Why do you deny yourself?"

"She has you, Jess. You fill her world in a way that I never could. Why would I want to come between you? Besides, Fee's interest in me is strictly temporary. Not to put too fine a point on it, but I've the wrong equipment to be anything more than a novelty for her."

"Yet she reacted to your touch, Hilary, in a way she claims only to have ever done for me. Are you suggesting that we're only playing with you, Becker?"

“No. But I don't think that you intended for this to be more than just one night."

Jess’ laugh was very soft.  
"I'm not sure we did,” she conceded, “but you fit so very easily with us. Let's give this a go, please?"

She could feel him shake his head.

"It takes more than just a good shag to make one partner worthwhile, much less two. You of all people should know that, Jess. Look what you've got together. How could I possibly want to jeopardize that? I care too much for you both AS FRIENDS to do that to you."

She sighed. "You know damned well that neither of us sleep around, Hilary. That wasn't just a shag, so don’t insult us by pretending otherwise. Just stay, please? At least till morning."

"Jess, this will all look different in the morning. Can you honestly say that you'll be glad to wake up and feel not one but two bodies wrapped around you in this bed?"

"How many people do you think Fee has dated since you met her at Sandhurst?"

He didn't reply; couldn't reply. He'd spent too much of his time studiously ignoring her love life until she met Jess. When Hilary failed to reply, Jess turned over to look at him eye to eye, a position he wasn't used to the tiny field co-ordinator being in when they were both upright. She kissed him softly.  
"She's been with one other woman, and it didn't end well."

"But-" he began, only to fall into pained silence once more.

Jess reached up and stroked his cheek.   
"You've really got no idea how much the exception you are, do you?"

He looked at Jess disbelievingly.

"If she wasn't so keen on the occasional toy, you would have had her maidenhead tonight." Jess was suddenly surprisingly fierce. “So don't you dare sneak out of this bed.”

If slapping him across the face with the facts was enough, then so be it. Jess would do anything to protect Fee from the heartbreak of waking up to regret the decision they'd made in inviting him into their bed.

"Why didn't either of you say anything, Jess?"

“Don’t look at me like that, Hilary, and for heaven’s sake don’t make a big deal of it. It’s not that it’s her first time having sex,” she pointed out, “just her first time with a man. If either of us had considered it meaningful, don’t you think we would have mentioned it?”

He nodded, reluctantly.

"It might not have mattered to either of you, but I still would prefer to have known," he grumbled. "Tonight was rather a bit short on foreplay by my standards."

Jess chuckled gently, her breath stirring and warming the hairs on his chest.

"Did you hear either of us complaining? Now please, stay for the moment. Let us wake up to see you sleeping peacefully beside us. The rest will wait."

Hilary kissed her gently. She could feel how he explored and tasted, lingering as if he expected he'd not get the chance to do this again. As she turned over to draw Fee close and snuggle into his body again, Jess swore she'd prove him wrong come morning.

~~oOOo~~  
Fee smiled at Jess, pleasantly surprised to find Hilary still asleep, and still in their bed. They moved slowly, and carefully, rolling him onto his back and positioning themselves on either side of him. Fee was surprised that he didn't react to them. She knew how light a sleeper she'd become and expected the same was true of anyone still serving. She reached out delicately, and found part of the web they'd woven still wrapped around him.

It had a mesmerizing beauty, a mesh of her power, and his oath, tied into Jess' emotions - and she hummed softly, as she realized that dumping power to ground through him had knocked him into a deep sleep.

"Poor boy," she murmured, "kitten, if this is even a quarter of what I've been doing to you for the past couple weeks, you have my sincerest apologies."

Much closer to being in control, Fee began to pull her power back inside her skin, and wrapped it up in a tidy bundle for the moment. Jess looked at her respectfully across Becker's sleeping body.

"Fee, exactly how long has it been since you were in this much control? I can't remember feeling you pull it all back in that tightly before."

Fee looked at her lover, then down at the man sleeping between them. She considered the question for a few moments before answering.

"Now that I think about it, Jess, I haven't had this level of control since I came back from theatre. I wonder what's changed?"

Jess looked downward pointedly and suddenly Fee felt conflicted.

"No. Absolutely not. There's no way you're going to get me to buy that what I needed all along was a good shag by a man."

Jess looked up at her again, "evidence says otherwise, love."

Fee shook her head, and leaned across to kiss Jess.

"Can we keep him, Fee?"

Fee scrutinized Jess carefully.  
"Yesterday you were worried that inviting him in would change everything, that I wouldn't love you anymore. What's changed, kitten, what'd I miss between last night and this morning?"

"He tried to slip out last night. I stopped him, and we talked, Fee."

For a moment Jess could see exactly what she'd feared. The mere idea that he'd tried to leave hurt her lover more than she'd ever admit. Jess hurried to continue before more damage was done by Fee's own thoughts.  
"Love, he was afraid of damaging our relationship, thought he was only needed to ground you - that we'd throw him out this morning."

Fee still refused to look her in the eye and Jess had a rare glimpse of exactly how easily hurt her lover could be. She was deeply grateful that they hadn’t stumbled into this situation earlier in their relationship. How to fix it when there were three of them involved was something going take careful negotiation. Suddenly Jess was all too aware of exactly how much work it was going to be for them all if Hilary chose to stay.

"Fee," she whispered, "you could have had him a dozen times over before you met me. And he would have stayed. He would never have left you. Now he's terrified of staying because it hurts him too much to think that he might eventually have to let you go."

Fee winced slightly, and looked thoughtful for a second.  
"Are you sure, Kitten? Sure you want him enough to defy convention? This isn’t going to be easy."

"Sure? No. And I wouldn't be honest if I said otherwise. But I think that if we're careful, we can make this work, and that it will be so much more than any of us asked for if we do. For that, I'm willing to take a risk. But this won't work if any of us only give it half our hearts. It's all or nothing."

Fee leant across and stole another kiss.  
"I don't tell you often enough how much of a treasure you are, do I kitten?"

"You may not say it with words but you certainly show me plenty often enough," Jess quipped back with a smirk.

Fee laughed, softly. Jess looked back down at Becker with a speculative gaze.   
"So, how exactly shall we wake him up and show him that he's wanted here, love?"

Fee smirked.  
"If you're sure kitten?"

Jess nodded, and Fee pulled a little power to the surface, before caressing Becker's face gently, and then kissing him. He reacted slowly and sleepily to her kiss, but didn't rouse as she expected.

Jess giggled, "have we truly exhausted him?"

"Possibly, kitten." She looked down the length of his body. "Well, not all of him ..."

Jess thoughtlessly licked her lips and Fee had to work hard to suppress howling with laughter.

"Well, go on, baby girl, if he's going to be woken up from a sound sleep we might as well make it worth his while."

Jess didn't have to be told twice. Loose hair curtained across her face as she slid down the length of his body to settle between his legs, eagerly wrapping her mouth around his quickly hardening cock.  
"Anybody would think you missed doing that to your lover, baby girl," Jess lifted her head momentarily, and wrapped her hand around the root of his cock. Her tongue flashed out, teasing the tip.

"Mmmm, variety is the spice of life," Jess replied before making a show of settling her mouth over just the tip of him and giving a quick messy, and thorough suck.

"Besides," Jess added as she took a moment to work the moisture of her saliva down his length with her hands, "you'll need a bit of show and tell I expect."

Fee shivered. "Then demonstrate for me, baby girl."

"You know me and my exhibitionist streak, love."

Fee grinned at Jess' comeback and then watched in fascination as Jess’ mouth wrapped beautifully around the girth of Hilary's cock. Wetly she slid down, taking him in as far as she dared before slowly letting him slide back out again. She was slow and deliberate, using his body to tease and teach Fee as she roused him from sleep. A deep moan from beside her made Fee look down. The open expression of bliss on Hilary's face as he awoke was delicious. Leaning down, Fee nibbled and stroked her way across the length of his shoulders and collarbone. She tongued her way up his neck to place a delicate kiss at either corner of his mouth.

"Good morning Hils," Fee spoke softly, and then kissed him soundly.

His body stiffened momentarily at the sound of her voice but a long gentle lick from Jess had him dissolving back into their care again.

"We've been waiting for you to wake up," Fee murmured as she kissed him once more.

"I don't think," he gasped, "that you've quite grasped the concept of waiting, Fee."

"Oh no, Hils. We understand quite well. I think we've been waiting for you for quite some time."

Jess let her mouth slide off at the end of a stroke with a wet pop. The grin she gave him was delightful, making his stomach turn somersaults.

"Now what's this I hear about you trying to sneak away last night?" Fee whispered in his ear.

Hilary’s mind blanked for a moment as Jess sucked the tip of his cock back into her mouth.

"Kitten, delightful as it is to watch you, I don't know that he can think properly while you're doing that."

Jess' head lifted again, and she pouted at Fee.

"Now, in case the way you woke up wasn't enough of an invitation, let me state this for you aloud: we - both of us - would very much like it if you stuck around for a bit. While we'll both be disappointed if you say no, I'm sure that we can manage to go back to the way things were. But really, we'd much rather that you say yes."   
As she spoke, Fee slid down to join Jess at his hips. She shared a slow simmering kiss with her lover before bending down to take up where Jess had left off. Hilary’s eyes rolled back in his head, as Fee tried to copy Jess' tricks, and Jess whispered in his ear.

"You know, she's still learning, but I think she's rather gotten the theory. Now you'll just have to let her indulge in a bit of practice."

"Fee," he panted, "if this is just the bottom of your learning curve, I can't wait to see what it's like when you get to the top.”

Fee laughed around her mouthful, and shivers ran up his spine at the sensation. He couldn't have stopped himself if he'd tried as his hips rolled, pushing him deeper into the warmth of her mouth. Fee hummed again and he groaned at the sensation. Jess mouth closed over his to steal the groan away as Fee continued to work up and down his length. The feather-like brush of Fee's hair across his hips added to the sensation, bringing him closer to his release. The sight of her red hair sweeping across his body was the catalyst that finally pushed him over the edge. Jess drank in his gasps and groans as his cum shot down Fee's throat and she swallowed, taking him in deeper for one last long suck. Which left him oversensitive and shaking slightly, a little wide-eyed as Fee and Jess shared a kiss over his prone form.

"You know, you two are dangerously persuasive when you want to be," he panted breathlessly, “care to have me return the favour?”  
Fee looked at him with a smirk and a gentle shove toward Jess.

"Why me?" Jess looked at her with surprise.

"Well, I always hate to send you off to such an inactive day without a bit of exercise..."

Jess pouted at Fee and Hilary laughed.

"... And I want to watch you together."

Hilary gave Fee a look that burned and smoldered, taking her breath away momentarily.

"Does that turn you on, Hils? The idea of me watching? Never would have pegged you for having an exhibitionist streak."

A light flush of colour crossed his cheeks, and he answered by pulling Jess into a kiss. Fee grinned, and settled back against the wall to watch the show.

"Maybe, it's just the correct audience, Hils?"

The flush spread across his chest and he ignored her in what had to be an intentional gesture. Looking at them together more closely, Fee realized that Jess was still and quiet, her body holding tension rather than melting into his kisses.

"It's okay, kitten," Fee said, stroking one hand down Jess' side, "let yourself go. I truly want to watch you two together."

Hilary pulled back from Jess a bit to slip a finger under her chin.

"Jess, we're all in this together. If we're doing something that's uncomfortable for you, you need to speak up."

Jess buried her head in his shoulder for a moment and he just held her loosely, tracing gentle patterns across her skin.

"You tell me what you want, yeah? Tell me what will please you. That's all this is about; my desire to please you, to show you how much we can both enjoy this."

Fee smiled at the image of her lover draped across her best friend. Jess pushed herself up, straddling him, in order to look him in the eye.

"Just a little scared of possible consequences, I guess."

"Jess, sweetheart, what consequences could there possibly be?"

Jess looked across at Fee briefly, and was surprised by the hunger she could see.

"I'm not as comfortable in my own skin as both of you are."

"Then why don't you let me help you get there," Hilary murmured against her neck.

Circling his hands around her waist, he lifted her gently off his lap and nudged her to lay down.

"Stretch out," he encouraged.

Jess looked at him questioningly but he gestured back toward the bed before him. Fee smiled softly to herself, almost envious of Jess. Hilary’s shoulder rubs were legendary.

By the time he was half way down her back, Jess was purring beneath him, mostly boneless. He bent his head toward Jess' exposed shoulder and kissed it gently. Jess sighed contentedly. Hilary’s eyes were positively feral when he looked up again. He spread his longer frame out above Jess, legs intertwining with hers. His mouth came down at the junction of her neck and shoulders, rubbed and nuzzled softly, then made his way up behind her ear.   
With a quick look up at Fee, his teeth closed lightly over the soft skin, drawing a hiss of surprise from Jess. He laved the little red mark he'd made with his tongue and rested a little more of his weight on Jess, who reacted by arching back into him. Hilary let his weight rest more fully on Jess, pressing her down into the mattress. She groaned and squirmed. He caught up her hands and drew them together above her head, placing a feather light kiss to each wrist as he did. One knee drifted idly between Jess legs and she writhed and stretched, trying to get his body to connect where she wanted it most.  
He leant forward and kissed the back of her neck, and then looked at Fee, a question in his eyes. The expression on Fee's face was lustful. The sight of the pair of them entwined to together was stunning.

"Patience, Jess."  
She ground back against his leg, and he groaned as it became apparent just how wet she was.

"To hell with patience," Jess whimpered beneath him.

Hilary chuckled, the feeling of it rumbling through his chest making Jess shiver with desire.

"Is she always this demanding?" he asked of Fee.

Fee nodded and smiled, "very much so."

He licked a broad stripe up Jess neck before whispering a question in her ear. Her answer was incoherent, but obvious when he nudged her legs further apart. The sight of Jess' beautiful rounded ass was luscious. Hilary took a moment to admire but the hitch in Jess' breathing brought him back to focus. He traced one palm up the inside of her thigh, loving the feeling of her muscles shifting and tensing as he drew closer to where he knew she wanted him to be.   
Fee caught her breath at the look of absolute worship in Hilary's eyes as his hand finally reached its destination, sliding slowly and reverently across the warmth at the apex of Jess’ thighs. Jess whimpered softly, and pushed back against the hand caressing her. He pinned her carefully with his free hand, and teased her sensitive flesh with delicate touches. Fingers slid and caressed, never quite going where Jess wanted them as she keened in frustration. Fee's fingers slipped down her own body as she watched Hilary play Jess like a fine instrument, the pair of them breathtaking together. He leaned toward Jess and nuzzled at her neck before whispering something in her ear again. Jess nodded loosely and the corresponding smile on Hilary's face was one that Fee had never seen before; equal parts tender and hungry. It was a smile she hoped she'd get to see again if they all played their cards right in the future.

Watching Hilary wrap Jess in his arms, fold his body around hers, felt a bit like the voyeurism it was. Something about the gesture was so intimate that it left Fee feeling jealous for a moment. But when he looked up at her, suddenly she wasn't alone any more. He was doing this just as much for Fee's benefit as he was to please Jess. She could see it in his eyes. There was something there, an asking of permission, that Fee found utterly endearing. Nodding mutely, her own wandering hands forgotten, Fee watched and waited.

With permission granted, and Jess's body pliant in his arms, he positioned himself and thrust smoothly into her. Jess moaned, and clenched, wet and slippery tight around the head of his cock.

"Shhhh, just relax," he soothed.

He released her hands, wrapping his own loosely over her hips as he finally slid into her completely with a groan.

Fee watched entranced by the expressions flitting across their faces. Hilary buried his head against Jess shoulder again as he began to move, hips rolling softly against Jess. Seeing the wet slide of skin against skin left Fee speechless with hunger. Jess let her head hang loosely, face covered by the curtain of her hair, as she relaxed into the movement and pleasure of their bodies joined together.

The look of complete and utter concentration on Hils' face made Fee grin. Apparently he was a lot closer to the edge than he wanted to be. Jess whimpered and arched her back, dragging him deeper into her body. Silently Fee reached over, and dragged her fingers down Hilary’s spine, caressing and drawing the power off him at the same time in a gesture that was far more controlled than she would have been capable of the previous night.

Hilary tossed a startled but pleased look over his shoulder before turning his attention back to Jess. She was so wrapped up in sensation that she hadn't even opened her eyes nor noticed Fee's intervention. The look on Jess' face was one of total ecstasy. Hilary curled his longer frame around hers, and whispered a question into her ear.

Jess nodded lazily and he withdrew before thrusting a little deeper. Jess squirmed in his arms and he kissed her neck. With her body stretched beneath his, Jess couldn't do anything but obey. She didn't have enough arm length to move back toward him, leaving him completely in control of their shared pleasure. Hilary thrust slow and gentle, maddeningly penetrating no farther as he waited for Jess to relax once again in his arms. She gasped as he found the right angle, the head of his cock sliding across the perfect spot inside of her, making Jess melt and shudder.

Fee smiled. The sight of them together, did unspeakable things to her. Slender hips swaying together, legs long and short competing for dominance as they each sought leverage, straining to bring their bodies closer as if the intimacy of having him sheathed inside her simply weren’t enough. She reached between them, fingers caressing across arousal slicked skin to find that place where they were joined. Fee smirked, and began to weave the power that echoed through the room. Jess screamed in pleasure at the touch of power that Fee pushed through them, and Hilary's hips stuttered sharply. Jess's orgasm was his undoing.

Fee chuckled in delight, her breath warm across Hilary's shoulder. The expressions of rapt joy on both her lovers' faces were almost identical. Hilary reached one long arm out to enfold her, bringing her closer to share in their experience. Fee could feel him fumbling for a moment with the power still rolling through the flat. She hissed sharply when he suddenly thrust it toward her with an inexperienced mental shove. However inexpert it might have been, the underlying intent was enough. Fee' felt a light flutter answer from deep within her body. She relaxed within his embrace and accepted the gentle caress of her orgasm as the gift it had been intended to be. She opened her eyes to twin smiles and stretched, luxuriating in the moment.   
“We should get going. I for one, need a shower,” Jess groaned as she stole a kiss from Fee and then pushed herself up and out of bed.   
Hilary frowned at the loss of warmth but Jess' gentle smile was more than he could stand. With a satisfied grin, he shoved himself off the bed to follow her out of the room. Fee's appreciative leer as he walked past her brought a chuckle to his lips. He snagged her hand and drew her up to follow.

Fee chuckled lightly.  
"Last one in does yesterday's paperwork?"

Hilary sputtered, "oi! No fair...."

Fee darted in for a kiss, then legged it towards Jess in the shower. Hilary muttered obscenely then took off in pursuit. By the time Fee was out of the shirt she’d slept in, he had the shower door in hand and was about to join Jess. Jess was already under the showerhead, eyes shut, shampooing her hair and the moan when he ran his hands through her hair was positively filthy.

"Jess..." he warned, but his hands continued running through the slippery strands of her hair and down her back, grabbing her bottom to pull her out of the spray and into his arms for a kiss.   
Fee took the opportunity to slip in beside them and dunk under the showerhead. Hilary watched her hungrily from over Jess' shoulder as the water streamed down her fit body. Fee smirked at his expression. And quite deliberately ran her hands down her own body, bringing her nipples back to a peak.

"Enough!" Hilary hissed, deliberately backing away from Jess' embrace. "If you two keep at it we're never going to get to work."

Fee pulled Jess in for a brief kiss, but nodded her agreement. They finished their shower, with a few more leers and smirks, and Hilary disappeared to change clothes at his own flat while Fee and Jess headed for work.


	9. Chapter 9

Toast and coffee in hand, Fee muttered obscenely as Hilary dumped a stack of forms on her desk. At his own desk writing up the night report before heading home, Lyle looked up just in time to catch the smirk on Becker's face and Fee's answering finger gesture.

"Lost a bet, Fee?"

"Yes," she grumbled. "Now bugger off, Jon. Weren't you lot supposed to be out of here an hour ago?"

"We were, but I've an anomaly report to write up. Connor is right, the damned things are getting more active."

"Wonder what the scientists are making of that, eh?" she said absentmindedly as she scribbled her signature on yet another requisition form.

"Dunno," Lyle replied as he stacked his papers neatly and placed them into a folder. "You can always ask Connor. That is, providing you're willing to sit through one of his lectures."

Fee winced at him, knowing that Lyle's assessment of her tolerance for scientific babble was entirely accurate. With a sympathetic smile, Lyle collected his jacket and headed for the door. It'd been a long night and he was looking forward to making better acquaintance with the inside of his eyelids.

"Oi, and the next time you use up the last of the tranq darts, the least you could do is write up your own bloody requisitions," Fee shot at him as he cruised down the hallway.

The melodic tenor of Lyle's laughter echoed back at her as he trailed out of sight.

For the next two hours without interruption, Fee diligently applied herself to the paperwork. She had to admit that her own pile of backlogged work was far greater than Hilary's. She'd been far too distracted of late, and she'd known it. The incomplete paperwork from the previous week was simply a testimony to her unbalanced state. She hummed to herself as she worked through the pile, relieved to be calmer, more grounded, and capable of thinking straight once again.

It was getting on to early afternoon when Hilary popped in, looking far too cheerful.

"How's the piles?" he asked as he sat gingerly on the corner of her desk.

"Bloody terrific, thanks for asking," she replied as she stood and stretched her clasped hands above her head, palms pointed toward the ceiling.

Hilary watched openly, reveling in the fact that for the first time since they'd met, he finally could appreciate the sight of her tight, athletic body so very close at hand. Fee smirked at the expression on his face. Unaccustomed but still very willing to accept it she pulled him to her for a slow, burning kiss. Hilary sank into the feel of her lips with a groan, only to pull away sharply a moment later.

"We can't, Fee," he muttered breathlessly. "What if someone sees?"

"Who could -" Fee was interrupted by the strident klaxon of the anomaly alert.

Becker shot her a look before walking over to slap the comm button on the wall.

"Report, Jess?" he commanded.

"The Forest of Dean anomaly has re-opened, sir."

Fee had grabbed her jacket and was out the door before he'd had time to respond to Jess. It didn't matter; he knew she'd be headed for the armoury to issue weapons to the on duty team and check out her explosive munitions kit. He took a moment to gather a few more details from Jess before heading toward the labs to round up Abby.

By the time Abby and Becker reached the centre of the ARC, the lads were already there signing out their communications kits and black boxes from Jess. Fee was perched beside Jess, one hip on the arm of her chair with her hand stroking idly down the side of Jess' neck.

As he came in range, the redheaded captain leaned over to give Jess a passionate kiss, earning an appreciative chorus of wolf-whistles from the lads. Becker almost fumbled catching the SIG Fee tossed his way because he was too busy glaring his disapproval at the attendant SF squad.

"Are you getting a bit out of practice handling REAL weapons, Hils? Perhaps you need someone to show you how it's done," she purred suggestively.

"Your team's been equipped, Captain," he replied pointedly, "I expect you to arrive on site before I do, or there'll be another round of paperwork added to your stacks."

Refusing to meet her eyes, Hilary quickly grabbed his own kit and scribbled his signature to the log beside Jess. Before she had the chance to puzzle any further over her partners' odd behaviour, they were both down in the vehicle bay and on their way out to the anomaly site. Jess sighed and resolved to ask them about it upon their return. For the moment, she settled in to listen to the comm chatter and track creature sighting on the local police band if any showed up before their arrival.

"Jess, we've an ETA of a bit more than 90 minutes, right?"

"Yes, Captain Becker. No creature incursions reported as yet. I'll keep you posted as you get closer to the forest."

"Are we still receiving signal from the cameras, Jess?" Abby asked.

"I haven't had time to check. Wait a moment. Yes, we're still getting signal."

"There should be four. Are they all still working?"

Jess checked the camera feeds quickly.

"No, I'm only seeing three at the moment."

Becker sighed.

"Well, that's still better than nothing. Give my compliments to Major Ryan for putting them out there."

"How far behind us are you, Becker?"

"A mile at the most?" he replied as he dodged around a slow moving delivery van.

Becker swore creatively as the traffic light in front of him turned.

"Make that more like three."

" 'Dare, double dare, you can't catch me' " Fee sing-songed the taunt at him as she swooped onto the motorway.

"So we’re back to old tricks are we, Fiona?" Becker grumbled, a challenge in his voice.

"Oh yes, Hils."

"Motorway control, this is Alpha Romeo. Three vehicle convoy en-route to shout. Do not pull over. Repeat do not interrupt. Clearance Juliet-Lima-Five-Alpha.”

"Thanks for clearing the way, baby-girl," Fee chirped happily.

"Fee ..."

 

"Fine, fine, Captain," she hissed, "thank you for notifying the local authorities, Miss Parker."

 

She had just hit ninety, Ditzy’s vehicle trailing close in her wake and Hilary floored his own trying to catch them. Sitting beside him in the truck, Abby could see Becker wince at Fee's barb. It was distinctly odd to see someone get under the normally stoic captain's skin. But then, rumor had it that Captain Black had known Becker for a very long time.

Abby cocked her head toward him as the scenery rushed by.

"Becker, how long have Captain Black and you known each other?"

"We went through command training together."

"Oh." Abby sank back into her seat, and Fee's curses came over the radio. "Green fleet coming up. Dodge the four tonners!"

"So it's a bit like working with one of your old university mates, isn't it?" Abby observed as Becker wove their truck skillfully through the forewarned traffic.

"Something like that. We've worked together in theatre as well. Saved each others' lives a dozen or more times before she arrived at the ARC."

"Gossiping with someone else, Hils?"

"Save it, Fee. Abby’s just making polite chatter."

"Touchy touchy, Hils. Someone not getting enough stress relief at home?"

"Don't go there, Fee. You know damned well that my personal life is off limits during working hours."

"Yes, well, someone has to entertain the troops, now don't we?"

"You and Jess do a fine job of that all by yourselves, Fee."

The silence in response spoke more eloquently than perhaps either of them had intended.

Fee checked her mirrors, and grinned at the sight of Becker's vehicle weaving through traffic and sped up again.

"Better hurry up, Ditz. Hils is going to overtake you if you're not careful and then YOU'LL owe him a round of paperwork."

The sandy haired medic didn't reply, but Fee saw his truck shoot past her two lanes over.

"Obviously I take that back, Lieutenant Owen."

"Shame I can't hand either of you my medical notes to complete!"

"Best mind your own, Fee, or it's you that will be owing, yet again, " Becker laughed as he pulled up just short of her bumper.

"As Jess declared us a convoy, perhaps we should play properly, gentlemen."

"Spoil sport," Ditzy grouched good naturedly as he fell back toward the other two vehicles, coming into place just in front of Fee. Seeing Ditz arrive, Fee pulled one lane to the side.

"Captain Becker, as you've got the civilian, you'd best take centre."

"Acknowledged, Captain Black," he responded with clipped tones.

"Alpha One through Three, you are approximately 30 minutes from the incident site."

"Thank you, Miss Parker. Any sign of incursions?"

"One creature just stuck its head through and returned. Looked to be some sort of therapod about 3 metres in length and a metre tall at the hips. Long narrow head, looked like three toes on the front limb that I could see.”

"Repeat, Jess?" Abby asked, suddenly alert and attentive at Becker's side.

Jess dutifully did so.

"That doesn’t match any of the creature descriptions from the Permian era."

“Can you figure out which creature this is if I send an image to your mobile, Abby?”

“I’ll give it a go, Jess.”

“Transmitting now,” she said crisply.

Abby scrutinized the stills Jess was sending. At the third image, she whistled softly.

“Coelophysis, I think. Which means, if there’s one, there will be more; they’re pack hunters. Looks like the other side of this anomaly might not be the same time period as before.”

Before Becker could reply to this new information, Jess broke into the comm traffic once again.

"Alpha One, We have Echo Hotel on site. Repeat, Helen Cutter on site."

"What's she up to, Jess? Rough guess on her age. Anything?"

There was a breathless moment.

"Running her images through our files, now, Captain."

"Jess, do you have eyes on her still?"

"Got her. Appears to be about two years post-disappearance. Currently looking around the site, keeps staring at the cameras."

"Captain, we know she's been killed once ..."

"Alpha One, we have 8 more incursions, repeat, 8 creatures!"

Fee stamped her foot to the floor and the other two kept up with her, weaving through traffic.

"Jess, anyone we can borrow at Cheltenham?"

"All Alpha Call Signs, Echo Hotel is in the woods, and we have a hunting pack loose. Delta troop is on standby to assist from Cheltenham."

Fee screeched to a halt in one of the forest car parks, and they loaded kit up at speed.

"Pistol, or the modified EMDs?" Becker sighed.

"Take both," Fee replied.

She swiped a bang pack and threw her spare at Becker. He caught it and turned to look at Abby who was efficiently arming herself with an EMD and a tranq gun.

The lads sorted themselves into a rough order of march without prompting, product of far too many call-outs. Finn and Blade led, Fee in third with Abby and Becker next. Ditzy and the other enlisted pair brought up the rear.

The pace they set was hard, and the knowledge they had of a pack of coelophysis and Helen Cutter in the woods with them didn't help.

"Alpha One. I have eyes on Hotel. She's returning through the anomaly with a fresh pack."

Blade dropped to one knee, firing as a pair of coelophysis appeared between the trees. One of the coelophysis hissed at Finn and dodged off into the woods. The larger man didn't have time to pursue as the rest of the pack appeared, hissing and chittering ominously.

"Form up around the civilian," Becker ordered.

They dropped back into a vague diamond formation, facing outwards. Abby went back to back with Ditzy and Fee took up position slightly in front.

"Keep calm and whatever you do, do NOT move out of formation." Abby said quietly. "These creatures will pick us off one at a time given half a chance."

The men nodded their acknowledgement, recognizing Abby's expert advice. One of the dinosaurs dropped, a victim of good marksmanship. Abby earned herself a nod from Ditz as she picked one off with her EMD.

"THAT one's coming home with us, gents. I want to see what makes these buggers tick."

Becker fired, and caught one of the dinosaurs a glancing blow from his shotgun.

"Having fun yet, Fee?"

Fee pouted at Becker.

"Not really. This is just a walk in the park. Haven't even gotten to play with the good toys yet."

"Dare I ask what's in that pack, Fee?"

Another of the creatures darted forward, and Fee emptied half a clip into it.

"If you don't know, Hils, you really should check what you sign over to me."

Jess' voice issued over the comms.

"Echo Hotel has reappeared. Repeat, Echo Hotel is back."

Becker swore violently.

"Sorry but we've no time to play, any more. We've got to get past these creatures."

Fee smirked, and pulled two items from her pack.

"Permission to deploy, sir?"

Becker nodded curtly.

"Am I going to regret this, Fee?"

"Do you regret anything else I've done, Hils?" she shot back.

He winced but tipped his hand in concession.

"Just try not to kill Miss Maitland's specimen?"

"I'd close your eyes on my count, gentlemen."

She slotted the pieces together, set the fuse and lobbed it towards the pack, landing it right at the feet of one of the creatures.

"NOW!"

The explosion was somewhat restrained for Fee, giving Finn and Blade the opportunity to pick off a couple of the stunned survivors. Seeing the situation well in hand, Becker and Fee broke off at a dead run toward the anomaly clearing with Abby on their heels.

Helen looked noticeably younger than either Abby or Becker remembered. She looked lost, less cunning and world-weary than their last run-in. She didn't even look back as she tore into the dazzling shards of light at full speed. Pursuit aborted, Becker, Abby, and Fee skidded to a halt.

"Bugger," Abby swore. "Well there goes that pay bonus Lester promised."

"That still stands?" Becker looked at her curiously.

"I assume so," Abby replied. "He's never rescinded the offer."

"I suppose there's still, what, eight years that she's unaccounted for - and if she's already worked out how to use the anomalies..." he let the statement trail off.

"It would still be useful to talk to her."

Fee moved away as Abby and Becker stood in the light of the anomaly and looked for the broken camera. Abby began carefully examining the tracks, both human and saurian.

Waiting nearby, Becker realized that Fee hadn't moved in quite some time. She stood just at the edge of the clearing looking inward toward the anomaly. Something about her posture set a chill up his spine.

"Fee?" he called, expecting to see her head turn toward him.

She didn't respond. Becker looked down at Abby one more time before inching away toward his fellow captain. He touched her wrist and her head snapped up. For just a moment, Becker could see what Fee was seeing and the clearing filled with ghostly figures. Power crackled beneath her skin, and she breathed.

"It's okay, Fee. I see them," pained to see the ghost of Nick Cutter wrapped in the arms of a woman who looked quite a bit like Jenny Lewis.

"This is where Professor Cutter always claimed he lost his Claudia Browne, right, Abby?" Becker called over.

"Yeah," she responded distractedly. "It was, according to Cutter. But then, I've no memory of Claudia Browne at all, much less standing in this clearing with her."

Fee's arm was trembling beneath his hand and Becker took a moment to look her over.

"Fee, an hour longer, that’s all I need. And I'm standing you down tomorrow."

Fee shuddered beside him and he just caught her as her knees gave out from under.

"Alpha Three, I need you at the anomaly site, now!" Becker roared, making Abby's head snap up from her observations.

Fee's eyes were rolled up in her head and her entire body was shaking uncontrollably in his arms. The anomaly snapped shut, and the light went from the clearing.

"Abby, there's a flare in the pack. Get it out for me."

Neither Becker nor Abby spared a glance for the anomaly as they both tried to get Fee turned onto her side. Abby moved to a position between Fee and the nearest tree, preventing the captain from banging into it as she seized. Ditzy burst into the clearing and headed for the group.

Ditzy grabbed one of Fee's arms and Becker instantly saw his opening. It was nothing more than a scratch from playing with the knife the previous night, but it was bleeding again having re-opened as Fee thrashed around on the ground.

"Looks like she got swiped by one of those things’ claws, Ditz," he offered.

Ditzy raised his eyebrow, but nodded.

"Does she have any previous history of seizures?"

"No," Becker responded quickly.

"In which case I'll administer a broad spectrum anti-venom and hope that it covers coelo-whatsis."

While Ditzy administered the injection. Becker splayed a hand across her other arm and pulled at the power crackling beneath her skin, wrapping it in his own oath, barely retaining control of it. Fee stopped shaking.

Becker’s vision shifted slightly, and he bit his lip, trying to retain control.

"Jess, have we accounted for all the intruders?"

"There's one stunned coeleophysis, and one still moving. Finn’s chasing it down right now."

"Ditzy, do we need to take Fee to hospital, or will the ARC be enough?"

“Assuming she is conscious and coherent within the next 5 minutes," Ditzy temporized, "she can get checked out back at the ARC and go home rather than hospital. But she's NOT driving. I'll take her in my vehicle for the drive back. And she's not to be left alone for the next 24 hours."

"I'll drive," Abby offered.

Fee's head lifted and Ditzy was quick to offer support, sliding gentle hands behind her neck.

"Easy, captain, it looks like you took a bit of an injury from one of those dinosaurs."

Fee blinked. She murmured something quietly as she slowly sat up. Still lightly connected to her through his oath, Becker heard her.

"Goddess help me, they're getting worse."

He leaned forward.

"This is a bad site, Fee," he whispered, as he slung one of her arms over his shoulder and eased her up to standing.

"But some of them aren't dead, Hils. Abby is standing right here in front of me."

He winced at her all too accurate memory of the incident she'd just re-lived.

'We'll talk about it later, Fee.”

She nodded and winced slightly. Ditzy moved to her other side, and between them they got her back to the car park and into his vehicle.

"I'll go collect the rest of the men and your specimen, Miss Maitland. You two best get her back to the ARC."

A large truck pulled into the car park and one of Lester's clean up squads unloaded, bio-hazard suits in place.

"Captain Becker, you'd best be careful when loading up. Don't want you getting sliced by those claws too."

Fee looked more than a little grey.

"Keys, Miss Maitland?” Ditzy offered before easing Fee into the back seat. “I need to keep an eye on Fiona."

Abby nodded, and he tossed the keys to her. He slid into the back seat beside Fee and checked her reactions again. It took Abby a couple of moments to adjust the driver's seat and then they were away.

"Alpha Two, Alpha Three, is there a problem?"

"Miss Parker, Fiona's reacted to something and we're bringing her back to the ARC. The site is secure and the anomaly has shut. Alpha One can give you a better idea of what's happening."

"Alpha One, report please."

There was an anxious edge to Jess's voice. He gestured at Finn to climb into the back of the vehicle with the coelophylsis.

"Tranq it again if it moves, Finn."

"Jess, can we switch to a private channel?"

The headset crackled, and then Jess answered.

"Secure, private channel, Hils. And I'm on my own at this end. Now talk."

He twitched slightly.

"Ghosts. That site is damaged in ways only some one with a degree of sensitivity would notice. We know about the reality shift that Cutter claimed has happened. We've lost men there on three separate occasions as well. Fee got caught in the backwash - her shields are still fragile. She had a seizure in reaction."

Jess hissed in alarm but Becker hurriedly continued in an effort to reassure her..

"She'll be alright, Jess. I managed to bleed off some of the energy and pass the seizure off as a reaction to an injury from the dinosaur. She's sleepy but coherent. Ditzy's got her in his vehicle. He'll sign her off for a couple of days. It'll give her time to rebuild and prepare for Samhain."

Jess breathed a sigh of relief. "Are you sure she's alright, Hils?"

"I'm pretty sure she'll be fine, sweetheart. But it'll be your turn to fuss tonight."

Jess was waiting in the vehicle park when Ditzy's truck pulled in. Abby hopped out and then Fee was easing out of the back seat, grey and shaky, with Ditzy looking on anxiously.

"Ditzy, can I take Fee home, or do you want to keep her in the infirmary for another couple of hours?"

Fee kept herself upright and the colour seeped back into her cheeks as Jess hugged her carefully.

"Take her home, Miss Parker. You have my mobile number if she gets worse." Fee sighed in relief and kissed the edge of Jess's mouth.

Jess herded her towards her car and looped a discreet arm around Fee's waist.

"Fee, how many weapons have you still got on you?"

"Just the knife and a Sig, baby girl. Ditzy's got my bang pack and Hils took the other Sig at the site."

Fee dropped heavily into the passenger seat of Jess's car. Jess closed the door carefully and slid into the driver's seat. Fee leaned over and stole another kiss before Jess shook her head, laughed and peeled out of the underground parking lot.

Back at their apartment block, Jess slung her arm around Fee's waist and guided her into the lift. They maneuvered down the hallway awkwardly and Fee leaned against the wall as Jess unlocked the door to their flat. Jess helped Fee through into the living room and Fee sank into the sofa tiredly before trying to pull Jess down with her. Jess shook her head and laughed.

"I need to get some food into you and then sleep Fee, not sex - however fun it would be."

Jess left her lover sitting on the sofa and stuck her head in the fridge looking for something to feed Fee. Her ears caught the sound of a bottle opening and she pulled out the cheese and biscuits with a sigh.

~~oOOo~~

Ditzy walked into the office the captains shared, and closed the door behind him, dropping into one of the chairs in front of Becker’s desk.

"Boss, care to explain what I just covered for?"

"It's being handled, lieutenant. It's not a medical issue; not really."

He pulled his oath to the surface, and allowed it to crackle beneath his skin, his protectiveness for Fee’s well being making it far too easy. He plucked the documents out of the medic’s hand, brushing the tips of his finger’s against Ditzy’s. The involuntarily hiss answered his question.

“Was there anything else, Ditzy?”

The medic shook his head.

“Though, boss? You might want to tone the Becker/Black show down slightly. You’re scaring the babies.”

The glare he received was answer enough, and the medic backed out of the office fairly sharpish.

Hils watched the door shut and dropped his head into his hands, trying to reign the livewire sensation in and fighting the urge to take refuge in Jess’s flat with the girls. He knew what they’d offered, but something was making him hesitate.

He buried himself in the reports from Afghanistan and the other theatres the Regiment was operating in instead, trying to catch up with the endless discipline paperwork associated with the post he was officially in. Even on detached duties, someone had to complete it, and as overstretched as they were no-one was covering his other duties while he hunted dinosaurs. Occasionally he found references to anomalies overseas. More often he ended up signing off on reports into deaths and injuries and bad behaviour.

The last report made him stop. His old team were in theatre under a new officer, and something didn’t sit quite right. He sketched out an email and fired it off to Maj Ryan; his predecessor on the project and the current 2IC of the Regiment, then returned to signing off on his subordinates’ reports. He sighed when he realised how much work he had left to do.

Lieutenant Lyle took one look at him when he arrived to start the night shift and backed out of the office slowly, looking like he’d just seen a dinosaur and retreated to the ranges to run proficiency tests on any victims within range.


	10. Chapter 10

It hurt - not being with them - and he hated himself for the weakness of it. Every time he had a moment to breathe, a moment to think, he found himself remembering the feeling of each of them in his arms, wrapped around his body, entwined around his heart in a way that left him starkly terrified.

He couldn’t do this, just couldn’t. Eventually Fee and Jess would drive him away again when they no longer needed him. And when they did, it would break him so thoroughly he’d end up as one of those suicide-by-enemy cases whose posthumous citations for bravery he’d been involved in drafting far too often in his time with the Regiment - with his father receiving the Elizabeth Cross and probably the George Cross in his name given the nature of the project.

So he found an excuse to decline their invitation to dinner. Found gentle ways to re-establish some distance from them both – threw himself into Regimental duties he’d been ignoring with Maj Ryan’s taciturn approval. Eventually they’d stop trying, he’d patch himself together and they’d go back to the safe distance kept between himself and Fee (now between himself and Jess as well). And if he couldn’t manage that? He’d take the next theatre rotation he was offered. He wasn’t sure whether Fee knew that she’d only ever been allowed a fraction of what he had to give. He’d worked so hard to hide his desire for her, buried it so far beneath their friendship that it was entirely possible she’d never noticed the depths to which it ran through his being. At least, he preferred to think that she’d never noticed.

The first time Fee had been deployed had almost driven him mad. Her inital training had been shorter than his, and she dived into bomb disposal with a glee that had scared him, and it had shown. Only a stiff talking to from his father and threats of being RTU’d as psychologically unsuited for the Regiment by his CO at the time had forced him to pull himself back together again.

The next time she’d deployed he’d been in theatre as well and had pissed off a lot of people by borrowing her – giving him the excuse to watch her back. He’d told himself that it was simply an extension of their friendship at Sandhurst and the edge that lent their interactions – there were no orders needed, and their team had been in high demand. But when they slept at night and he couldn’t shut off his awareness of her proximity he’d been forced to admit to himself that it was something more. He knew that he’d be disowned by his father and brought up on charges of conduct unbecoming if he were to ever give in to the way he felt for her.

The ache in his chest had been almost as much from relief as pain when duty put distance between them once again as he was returned home half a world and many time zones removed. He’d thrown himself into chasing dinosaurs and at least by then Fee was chasing bomb makers with men he knew he could trust.

When his men had stumbled upon Fee in the middle of answering an anomaly call, found her taking on dinosaurs with a sword, he’d felt like he was drowning yet again, forgotten how to breathe. But then Fee had found Jess and both of their worlds had lit up like a star gone nova, and he’d quietly slipped into long hours spent on duty, fading into the background once again. Told himself that the most he could be was her friend – perhaps her brother.

And then there was Jess. He’d noticed her. It’d been impossible not to in those early days after the ARC was re-opened and it was just the couple of them knocking around like dried peas in the bottom of a barrel. Major Ryan had looked at him and told him that Lester wanted him back on the project. He’d tried ever so hard not to be drawn to her charming smiles, the ones that seemed to be reserved just for him. It had become harder and harder to resist as the ARC filled with life once again, as he watched a newly returned Abby and Connor revelling in the closeness that a year without human distractions had gifted them. Fee’s arrival had been a blessed distraction from his growing interest in the bubbly little field coordinator. And when the two of them had hit it off he’d begun to think that perhaps, if he just found somewhere else to be for a little while, all of his feelings for them both would finally disappear like the phantoms they’d always been.

But then they needed him. Truly needed him in a way that it seemed no one else could possibly fulfil. And he was terrified of what would happen when they didn’t need him any longer. Because he couldn’t bear to go through that separation yet again. From either of them. Not now that he knew how they tasted on his tongue, how they sounded when panting with desire, what it felt like to have them both wrapped around him so intimately that it was beyond comprehension he should ever have to go without feeling that again.

The edge he was riding was one he'd seen his father throw himself over a dozen times. And the similarity scared him because he knew how badly his father had broken in the process. Once the oath settled more fully on him after his first tour of command, Hilary had been able to see the tightly coiled knot of painful hatred that had woven itself around his father. He was appalled to find echoes of the same poison eating away at himself. He recoiled, pushed it away, tried with everything he had not to become that person. In the years since he’d become contained and withdrawn, retreating from the freely offered touches and love he craved so hard it ached.

It hurt.

But not as much as it will hurt when they got bored with me, he reminded himself. And he turned his back deliberately on the warming fire Fee and Jess offered once again. He was addicted and damned, and entirely too aware of it all.

Coward.

He swallowed the label and switched Fee's shifts for the following week, debated loaning her to the police for an upcoming security operation. He would find excuses to see less of Jess when they were both on shift. He made himself invisible. And when the night closed in on him dark and lonely, he desperately ignored the pain as he drew the blankets closer around his shoulders.

~~oOOo~~

Fee woke to the delightful sight of Jess' naked body sprawled beside her and completely uncovered. She took a pleasurable moment to enjoy the sight will taking mental stock of herself. Over all, she felt a good deal better than she had the previous day. No shakes or exhaustion seemed to have lingered with a good night's rest as remedy.

Knowing she had the day off, Fee began to mentally compose a shopping list. Samhain was just the other side of sleep once again, and with all the recent upheaval in her personal life as well as more frequent anomalies, she hadn't had the chance to prepare her offerings or purchase ritual supplies yet.

Jess stretched beside her and she grinned. It would be an educational shopping trip for her lover as well. Though they'd been together for close to a year, there were plenty of things Jess was still learning about Fee's life, particularly in regards to her religious beliefs and practices.

Jess knew some of her practises, was quite happy with the altar that Fee kept dressed with flowers. But Samhain was one of the festivals that reached under her skin, and she needed to celebrate properly. Most of the holidays in the wheel of the year could pass unremarked. Fee had become accustomed during her time in the service to not really having a safe place or time to hold ritual. In fact, when she came to think about it, this was the first time she'd have a proper space in which to hold a full ritual since she'd settled down. One where she could be sure no one would interrupt. Yet again, she found herself grateful that Jess had stumbled into her life.

Salt. She'd need salt for creating a consecrated circle in which to hold ritual. She realized that Jess was going to laugh at the idea of purchasing something as mundane as salt in such a large quantity. She had so much to share with her lover! The prospect was exciting.

Fee stroked one finger down Jess’ ribs, knowing she was a little ticklish, and was rewarded by a giggle.

"Fee," Jess drew her name out in a long warning. She knew that Fee would win in a fight, but she also knew that the redheaded captain was just as ticklish as herself. Fee smiled, but rolled away from Jess, the dried sweat prickling on her skin.

"Share a shower, kitten?"

"When have you ever known me to say no to an offer like that?" Jess quipped back with a leer.

Fee laughed, and Jess was relieved at how like her it sounded. Fee headed for their shower, a swing in her hips and Jess followed, watching appreciatively.

"Feeling better this morning, love?" Jess asked as Fee turned on the taps and adjusted the temperature.

For a moment, Jess felt that the bathroom was far bigger than it had been the previous morning. She realized with a pang what was missing and hastily steered away from that thought.

Something of her thoughts must have shown on her face because a moment later, Fee wrapped her arms around Jess.

"Don't worry, kitten. We'll get him sorted out."

Jess nodded and moved to follow as her lover stepped into the shower enclosure.

"So what would you like to do with the day?"

"I've got a couple of things I need to prepare for tomorrow, kitten. Will you come with me?”

Jess looked puzzlement at her.

"What sorts of things?"

"Ritual things, baby girl. Samhain's one of the festivals I celebrate properly. And I've not had a chance to buy most of things I need for tomorrow night."

"I had no exposure to this sort of thing before I met you, Fee. What sorts of things does one need for a ritual that can’t just be gotten at the market?"

Fee smiled, and ran her fingers through Jess's hair.

"Fresh flowers for my altar, salt and rosemary and slips of yew. A good bottle of red wine and some valerian and a piece of game. I need a virgin blade as well and an offering for my goddess."

Jess stuck her face under the water momentarily to rinse the soap off. When she popped back up again, she looked impish.

"A virgin blade? Because a couple of nights ago...." She let the sentence hang loaded with potential in the air between them until Fee blushed as brightly as the red of her hair.

"Slightly different context, kitten. But I did rather leave myself open to that one didn't I?"

Jess grinned happily in reply and took the opportunity to begin soaping up Fee's body for her. She slid her hand suggestively across her lover's mons, waiting to see if she'd take the bait or blush even further. When her hands slipped down to caress around the ticklish back of Fee's calves, strong fingers wrapped firmly around her wrist and pulled her back up for another kiss. Fee quickly had her pinned to the shower wall and Jess laughed.

"In this context, kitten, I mean a knife that's never drawn blood. But ..."

She kissed Jess fiercely.

"I can see why you'd make that association. Unfortunately I rather tainted my sword using it to kill dinosaurs last spring."

"And that knife you won off Blade has certainly been used before..." Jess added.

"Isn't there a way to," Jess waved her hand vaguely, "wash clean, something that's been improperly used? Otherwise it must get rather expensive, replacing blades regularly."

"There is a way to cleanse goddess dedicated tools, Jess. But it's another ritual and would take me the best part of a moon cycle to complete. In this case it's easier for me to buy a new working blade, especially as my last disappeared in transit."

"Does that happen often?" Jess asked with a look of surprise.

"More often than many will admit. But my kit has spent a lot of time in transit in the last five years, Jess. I've spent a little over eighteen months of that period in theatre and another eighteen in training. In seven moves, something was going to walk off. Unfortunately, it was one of my favorite ritual tools."

Jess winced, "that must have set you back a pretty penny considering you haven't replaced it."

"The problem isn’t the cost so much as finding a good blade, love. They're about three to four hundred quid, and I need to handle them to find the right one. I haven't had the time or the need until now."

Jess nodded as she stepped out of the shower and grabbed a towel. She briskly rubbed her hair and body dry before replying.

"So where does one go shopping for a ritual knife? I expect it’s rather a different place than one would find a hunting knife or the sort used as weapons?"

"If I'd planned ahead, Jess, we'd have been in Glastonbury last weekend - but there are a couple of shops I can try around here. "

"Where do you go to get whatever else is needed?"

"A good supermarket. Salt and rosemary are easy. We've got the game in the freezer and there's a couple of bottles of wine in the flat that should do. The yew will have to come from the same shop as we'll try for the blade and the valerian can be purchased from an herbalist. I'll know the offering milady wants when I see it. The last challenge is the flowers. I was trying to grow my traditional offering of poppies at the ARC but mine failed to flower.”

"Does the game need to be cooked?"

Fee laughed softly.

"The game is for us and any guests to eat, baby girl."

"Have you invited company, Fee?" Jess asked curiously.

"Sort of, kitten. I celebrate Samhain with a Feast for my beloved dead. Part of the ritual is to serve an empty place setting or two, and invite them to attend."

Jess looked at her oddly for a moment before shaking her head.

"If you'd said that 8 months ago, I would have seriously questioned your sanity. After what I've seen the past few weeks? Won't even blink an eye if your beloved dead do show up. Hell, I'll even politely offer them a drink."

"Morgan will appreciate that, kitten."

Hearing the single "r" in the name, Jess winced. She knew that Fee's younger sister's death was still a delicate subject. Uncharacteristically though, Fee continued comfortably onward with her explanation despite having mentioned her sister.

"The salt, rosemary and yew are for the protective circle I’ll be creating in which to hold the ritual. For the invited dead to attend, I’ll have to drop the normal wards on the flat to let them in."

Jess nodded her understanding. She remembered when Fee had put the wards in place upon finally moving into the flat for good. She'd explained that they were a way of keeping out anyone or any thing with ill intent toward either of them. From what Jess had experienced before Fee worked her magic, she wasn't about to complain at the added protection. Christine Johnson's attempt to garner information by breaking into Jess' flat was still an experience that left her with a strong desire to leave every single light on at night.

"So you take away the normal wards for the night and replace them with something more flexible that will allow the ghosts you've invited to come inside. What does it take to undo that once you're done with the ritual?"

"The quick and dirty way to take apart a protective circle is to simply sweep it up with the right broom. That will bring it down quickly. The proper way to take down a circle is a bit more complicated. Not really worth explaining right now unless you’re planning to begin studying magic yourself. As for the wards, they’ll reset by themselves if I've built them properly."

Fee herded her lover back towards their bedroom.

"This is going to be easier if we take my motor bike, kitten. It’s very hard to find parking near some of the shops."

"Are you sure you're okay driving?" Jess looked at her dubiously, worrying at her lower lip with her teeth.

Fee smiled, and held her hand out flat, displaying not even a trace of the shakiness from the previous night. "I'm fine, Jess. I knew that site might be bad, but adding in my already fragile shields it was that little bit too much. Don’t worry, I've had more practise than I'll admit to in recovering from backlash."

Fee pulled her in for a kiss but Jess still looked a little hesitant. In a rare reckless moment, Fee let herself sink down into the power, pulling together the strands delicately before wrapping them around her geas with a subtle suggestion threaded beneath them. For a moment, Jess remained hesitant, but then she shrugged calmly and went to the wardrobe to grab her riding leathers as if she had never been concerned at all. Fee let it stand for a few more moments as she watched Jess squirm into the tight leather trousers. Then she pulled the power back once again and balled it up, binding it tightly away and leaving Jess as she had been before. Jess blinked hard then looked up at her with a fury.

"Fee, that was completely unnecessary! I'm sure you could have proven your point without manipulating me."

"But the point’s been proven none the less, hasn’t it, baby girl?" she asked, letting the southern drawl of her childhood slip into her voice. She dug her own leathers out of the wardrobe and started to slide into them.

Jess stared hard at her lover's back for a few minutes as she went about their room dressing. She wasn't entirely certain that she was comfortable with Fee's easy dismissal of her use of power, but she couldn't figure out why or how to bring it back up in conversation without having it devolve into a fight. Sighing, Jess plucked a shirt out of one of her drawers and pulled it on over her head. She'd let it go for now.

Fee felt a twinge of guilt playing across her nerves, dismissed it, and pulled her own top on. She swooped down to grab the pannier bags off the floor and was waiting by the door impatiently, jacket in hand by the time Jess emerged from their bedroom.

"Coming, kitten?"

~~oOOo~~

"I should have figured that's what you'd be called to, kitten." Fee said wryly as she plucked a book out of Jess’ hands. "’Weaving Word Wisdom’; a nice place to start learning about the Ogam even if it is written by a Reconstructionist. I'll add to my basket, but you need to promise me I can give you some basic lessons before you dive into that." Jess smiled and planted a kiss on the corner of her mouth.

Fee watched her disappear into another section of the shop and shook her head fondly.

"Is she your apprentice or your lover, Fiona?" Fee spun on her heels and glared at the woman behind her. She put her hands up and smiled.

"I'm Heather. The shop’s mine. And before you ask, I recognised you from a description Skye once gave; flaming red hair and a geas so strong you can taste it in the air.”

"She's my lover,” Fee responded shortly. “Do you have any good blades in stock, Heather?"

"From the looks of it your lover’s well on her way to needing an apprenticeship, “ the shorter woman replied with an easy nod toward the other side of the store. " She's just found the blades - and seems to be doing a good job on her own of picking out the properly made ones. And I’ll point out that she's reached straight through my wards to do so. Let me show them to you and and you’ll see what I mean ..."

Jess was standing in front of a warded cabinet, with three sheathed blades in her hands. Fee's back stiffened, and she turned to the shop owner.

"In the name of whichever mistress you hold dear, please tell me there was nothing but wards on that." Fee's fingers twitched for a weapon that wasn't there.

Heather nodded. Fee touched Jess's shoulder and the tiny woman spun round, the blades still cradled in her hands. One was a ebony handled with a Damascus steel blade, the second rosewood and stainless and the third carved of obsidian.

"Kitten, hand me the knives, please?"

Jess shook her head blindly for a second and then handed two of the three knives to Fee. The third she slid the flat of the blade across her palm in an absent minded manner.

"I'll take all three blades. The ebony is definitely mine, and I'm fairly sure I know who the obsidian belongs to as well. I also need some yew and valerian. Have you got any in stock?" The dark haired woman smiled and pulled out two jars from an apothecary cabinet.

Fee placed the blades she was holding on the counter and pulled Jess in for another kiss.

"You sure you want yew, Fiona? It's old magic, unpredictable."

"Skye taught me it's uses. And I desperately need to lay some of my ghosts to rest this year."

Heather smiled soft and wistful understanding as she rang the items up without further question. Jess loaded their purchases into the pannier bag while Fee paid the total with a light wince.

Outside the shop, Fee knelt to unlock the chain securing the motorbike. She wrapped it low around her hips, garnering a hungry look from her lover as she swung one leg easily up over the saddle and slid into position. Toes resting lightly on the ground, she held it steady for Jess to clamber up behind her onto the pillion seat. The three packaged knives were pressed between their bodies, wrapped beneath the front of Jess’ jacket.

"Well that was far more productive than I’d hoped for. We need to get those knives back to the flat and safely tucked away before doing the rest of the shopping."

“Fee, love, why do I get the sense that you don’t just mean putting them away in a locked cabinet?”

“There’s more to these particular blades than what’s seen with the eyes. They’re carefully cleansed and awaiting use in ritual. A bit like a blank slate. I’d rather not have anything happen to change that before we get home. As I’ve said before, it can be a costly and time intensive mistake to correct.”

~~oOOo~~

Fee pulled three squares of raw silk from her workbox, and wrapped each knife separately before laying them on her altar. She rose and genuflected shallowly, before turning and walking back into the main room and kissing Jess properly.

"I owe you an apology for what I did earlier, baby girl," Fee twisted her hands together, hesitated. "Manipulating you was something I swore to myself I’d never do unless your life was in danger. It was dancing on the edge of my own ethics ..."

Jess caught one hand and uncurled it.

"You didn't hurt me, love. Just make that promise to me now, please? I don’t want to ever mistrust your intentions.”

Fee nodded soberly before disappearing into the guest bedroom. Jess chose wisely not to follow, assuming Fee wouldn’t have walked away if she hadn’t wanted time to herself. When she re-emerged a few hours later, Fee was holding a thick hard bound book between her hands.

“I asked you to promise me something earlier today as well. Do you remember?”

Thinking back Jess nodded slowly, waiting to see where Fee was going.

“This book is one that my old teacher, Skye, and I compiled by hand when I began studying with her. It was a training manual of sorts. It’d been a while since I’d cracked it open but I think it’d be a good place for you to start. All I ask is that at the start you not try any of what you read without me. Because I was self-taught, I made some pretty stupid mistakes before Skye took me on. I’d rather you not get to repeat those experiences.”

~~oOOo~~

Fee’s nightmare almost threw Jess out of bed. One moment she’d been asleep and the next, she was rolling off the edge of their bed, narrowly avoiding yet another blow as Fee thrashed and fought. At first, Jess panicked, thinking it was another seizure. The mobile had been in her hand, about to bring up Ditzy’s number on speed dial, when Fee had stopped just as suddenly as she’d begun. Jess banged her shin in her haste to get back to Fee’s side. Her lover’s smooth red hair was tangled and sweat soaked when she pushed it away from the side of her neck to check her pulse. Fee’s hand grabbed her wrist before she could touch her again.

“Just, give me a minute,” she stuttered.

Fee’s fingers laced between her own as Jess sat beside her, waiting for answers. When Fee began to shiver from the cooling sweat, Jess pulled the blanket up from the end of the bed and draped it across her. Her lover smiled at her thankfully and squeezed her hand once more.

“It’d feel better if it was you warming me up,” she murmured.

Wordlessly, Jess slid in beside her beneath the blanket and wrapped her own body around Fee, curling in tightly to press her lips to the skin of the taller woman’s shoulder blade. She could feel Fee begin to relax again as the chill and nightmare both receded. Jess was almost asleep again when Fee’s voice brought her back to attentive consciousness.

“It’s sad, Jess. They wanted each other so very badly and in a single blinding moment, it was all gone. I think I understand all too well now why the reports suggest that Professor Cutter became reckless, possibly a little bit mad, after that anomaly.”

“Claudia Browne?” Jess whispered the name like a question. On his drive back to the ARC, Hilary had related to Jess some of what he suspected Fee had been seeing in the Forest. It seemed that name was always spoken in a whisper by those who knew of Cutter’s might-be hallucination. As if no one wanted to speak ill of the dead, or the missing, if Cutter was telling the truth about the woman who’d been an alternate reality’s doppelganger for their own Jenny Lewis.

“I saw them at that anomaly site. Or at least, I assume it was them since I don’t think Jenny Lewis ever kissed Professor Cutter like that. It was so raw. They wanted each other so much but Helen Cutter’s existence always stood between them. Even though his ex-wife couldn’t have cared a wit about Cutter, he never moved on. I can respect his fidelity, but I don’t see why he couldn’t have shared life his with both of them, assuming Helen returned to this time and explained her actions.”

Jess lay silent and stunned at the insight which Fee had unwittingly shared. Jess hadn’t told her lover anything more about the late night conversation she’d had with Hilary when he tried to leave. Was Fee subconsciously picking up bits of that conversation or was she piecing together something else? The similarities in what she’d just described and their own situation at present were startling.

“Is that how you feel right now, Fee?” she asked gently. “Are you torn between wanting to remain faithful to me and wanting Hilary?”

“Not torn,” Fee responded hesitantly, “because I want to have you both. If that’s not what you want though-”

“No,” Jess broke in hastily, wanting to make sure Fee didn’t load herself down unnecessarily with guilt about the way she felt. “Finding you was like finding home. I thought I had everything I wanted, but then we found him. Now it’s like I’m missing my right arm and I can’t go back to the way it was before. I can’t imagine my life without you both.”

“So what do we do? How do we move forward? Because if his behaviour yesterday was anything to go by, I’m pretty sure Hils is well on his way to tying himself in knots over this.”

“You’d noticed?” Jess replied sarcastically.

“Pretty hard not to when I noticed this morning that he’d rearranged the duty roster to put himself on opposite shifts from either of us for at least a fortnight.”

“Yeah, I saw that when I checked my email briefly. Considered fixing that little oversight on his part but I thought I’d talk to you first, make sure this was still what you wanted before asking Major Ryan to counter those orders. As soon as you’re up for it, we all need to sit down and talk this out.”

“After Samhain, baby girl. I promise.”

Jess squeezed Fee tight and dropped another kiss on the tip of her shoulder blade.


	11. Chapter 11

The table was laid and the candles were a little more than half burnt. Fee took a deep breath and reached, wrapping her geas around herself and trusting her goddess to catch her. A second breath and she slipped the knife across the palm of her hand.

"With my blood I welcome thee and bid thee dine with me. Till the candles burn out, I draw down the veil. Speak and I will listen. Be welcome!" She smiled, and wrapped a bandage around her hand.

The first of her ghostly visitors was her sister. At the edge of 16, Morgan looked much as she had the last time Fee had seen her alive. Penelope Skye, the witch who'd been Fee’s mentor, was escorting Morgan.

"Welcome, Mori; Mistress Skye."

"You've played an absolute blinder, Sis! I wish you'd met Jess while I was still alive."  
Morgan slapped a hand over her own mouth and looked a little guilty. Fee shook her head.

"It's alright, Mori. I've worked through most of that guilt. I just miss you now, Sis."

"Fee, sweetheart, what did I tell you about wording your evocations carefully?" Skye spoke quietly. "I'm not entirely sure who will be through tonight."

The third and fourth ghosts to appear brought Fee snapping to attention. Mori grinned and picked up a glass of wine to wander through the flat with.

"Poppy, how do I ...?"

Fee shook her head. Mori was about the only person that ever got away with using that nickname.

"Ma'am, Sir, what brings you here?"

Fee tried to watch the two ghosts before her but a fifth ghost, insubstantial and just outside her field of vision, kept her slightly distracted. The Major's smile was more sincere than Fee had expected.

"Just checking on you, Fee. You were one of my favourite junior officers and you did well with the squadron. My death wasn't your fault - do you really believe you'd have kept your captain’s pip if they blamed you?"

The Colonel, an older man who bore a striking resemblance to Captain Becker with silver hair, leant in and kissed her cheek.

"It's good to see you again, sweetheart. Those pips look as good on your shoulder as they do on my grandson’s. You be good to him and Jess, Fiona. You three make a nice set. And I want great-grandchildren."

“Shmar dar hal sahrah. Fahshah namkwdas. Kafir!”

The Afghan translator appeared right in front of Fee and she flinched at the hatred in his eyes. She already blamed herself for Aziz's death. The fact that he now thought her to be an infidel and a whore hurt almost as badly.

Jess heard a stream of Farsi, heavy with malice, which drew her to peek around the edge of the bedroom door. She recognised most of the ghosts from photos Fee had shown her. As more and more ghosts arrived, Jess became concerned. Some of the ghosts weren’t recognizable at all. A few, including former members of the ARC, were people that Jess knew Fee had never met.

She looked for reassurance in Fee's face but there was none to be found. Frightened, Jess ducked back into the bedroom and dialed Becker's mobile.

~~oOOo~~

Fee winced as more ghosts became visible and she stopped recognising them. Skye's words were rather more portentous now.

An untidy middle age gentleman with dishwater blond hair barged his way to the front. He was vaguely familiar from early ARC reports.

"Tell Connor to fix my bloody model, Miss Black. He needs it to keep predicting the anomalies and rumour says you'll need it as well."

"Nick Cutter?" Fee looked distressed. "I’m sorry, sir, but Connor won't believe me even if I do pass along your message. Why should he believe I’ve spoken to a ghost?"

“You just remind him about that time I caught him sleeping through one of my lectures and made him write an additional 20 pages for his dissertation. He got me back for it, he did. Wrote the entire 20 pages on one bloody fossil record that no self-respecting archaeologist would have used in citation. He knew in the end that I’d make him throw out those 20 pages before submitting the dissertation to the board.”

Fee whimpered as yet another ghost stepped forward and touched her hand lightly. She looked up into an astonishingly bright blue set of eyes.

"Your soldier boy is about to ride to the rescue, Fee, but I need you to tell Lester that Helen is dead, but not dead yet. She's using this time as one of her major pit stops. You saw her at the last anomaly, but that's not the end of it."

~~oOOo~~

Becker hadn't got too much from Jess's incoherent phone call. Throwing his combats back on he slipped a knife into his boot and clipped a holstered pistol onto his belt. Sprinting down to his truck, he gunned the engine and sped across town, throwing the vehicle through an unholy range of manoeuvres normally reserved for closed course combat driving exercises.

He punched the buttons on the elevator in frustration and shook his head before sprinting up the stairs, pistol drawn. Fee and Jess's front door was locked and he just manage to pull the kick when he remembered the key Jess had given him still hanging off his own keyring.

Hilary opened the door and promptly walked smack into the edge of Fee’s wards. At his feet was a thin line of salt mixed with herbs. Sliding the pistol back into its sheath, he looked around and saw an old-fashioned broom just inside the door. With an impatient sigh he picked up the broom and dashed it across the line, feeling the fizzle and pop of energy dissipating as he scattered Fee’s protections back into random grains strewn across the hardwood.

This time when he stepped forward there were no obstructions. Fee's passive wards screamed across his skin and he pushed through them, holding the image of the three of them together in the front of his mind. The energy snapped around Hilary and suddenly he was through, and confronted with a roomful of ghosts, Jess in the doorway to the bedroom, a couple of vaguely female shapes guarding her. He couldn't see Fee but he could feel her distress and his oath rose, feeding off the uncontrolled energy and his protectiveness. Hilary began to push his way towards Fee's distress and anxiety but one of the women guarding Jess moved forward to block his path.

"Why?" Her voice was like the edge of the wind, more felt than heard.

"She and Jess are mine to protect."

She raised her eyebrow.

"My Fee would object if she heard you say that, but I believe you, Hilary. You have my blessings, and the candles are the key."

Hilary nodded and wrapped the power riding his oath around him, pulling in more until he could push through the mass of ghosts. Fee was rocking quietly, tears streaming down her face. As he tried to move towards her, the three candles on the table, two-thirds burnt, caught his eye. He pinched them out throwing a spike of power through them to flash-melt the remainder of the wax. The ghosts began to disappear, popping out of sight in clumps. He blinked as he saw Cutter and Stephen kissing each other as they vanished from view.

The number of ghosts dwindled down to the final few. With a shock, Hilary finally realised that the two women flanking Jess were ones he recognized from snapshots: Fee’s sister, Morgan, and her former teacher, Skye. But what made him ache were the two forms standing beside them. His grandparents. The smile he gave them all as they faded from view was at once wistful and serene.

Jess moved faster than he had ever given her credit for and quickly wrapped herself around Fee. Seeing that she was being tended to, Hilary struggled momentarily with the power that he had raised. The combination of his own oath and emotions he had yet to completely acknowledge had made him reckless. He’d drawn more power to himself than he truly needed and it left him shaking in a way he hadn’t experienced outside of combat.

With a deep breath and aching need, he brought it back under control. Cautiously, he moved toward the girls until he could rest his hand on Fee's shoulder, letting the power grounded itself by completing the circuit he now knew was always there just below the surface. Fee giggled uncontrollably and Hilary winced at the brittle sharp edged sound.

“Gods, she’s a mess. What the hell did she do, Jess?”

“I think she screwed up, though I’m not sure how.”

"Well, whatever she's done, I don't think she's going to be in any shape to talk about it right now. We'd best get her to sleep."

Jess looked thoughtful for a moment. "Fee said something earlier about the wine."

He turned and poured a fresh glass, sniffed at it and handed it to Jess.

"What's she laced it with, Jess? Do I need to keep her away from the drugs testing team?”

"Valerian? Honestly I've no clue what it does."

"Any chance it's in a book somewhere around here?"

Jess tilted her head. "Try the encyclopaedia on her desk. I know she was cross-referencing from it earlier."

Hilary gave a tight nod as he crossed the room to pick up the book in question. Flipping through it and was grateful to find that it was well organised. He skimmed one finger across the information he’d found before summarizing for Jess.

“It’s used for purification. But there’s a side note that says it also helps with insomnia,” he provided succinctly.

“Now I remember! Fee said it always made her sleepy. She joked that it’d be the first time in ages that she preferred sleep over sex.” Jess replied, blushing.

He raised his eyebrow, and Jess laughed, before kneeling and holding the glass to Fee's mouth. Fee giggled manically and Jess set the glass down while she tried to coax her lover into a more stable frame of mind.

Seeing Jess pre-occupied, Becker made to slip out of the door. Catching the movement out of the corner of her eye, Jess scrambled to her feet. Her finger poked him hard in the chest as she blocked his path to the door and moved deep into his personal space.

"Don't you dare leave, Hils. Neither Fee nor I are in any fit state to protect ourselves, and I am not convinced that the wards have come back up. We need you. Please?"

He acquiesced, and Jess sighed in relief.

"Help me get her to bed. I can’t carry her myself but she's completely insensible and likely to be asleep soon.”

Hils scooped Fee up in his arms, and carried her back into the familiar room, with the candles alight on the altar. He placed her down on the bed gently and Fee tried to pull him down with her. He peeled her hands away, and pushed Jess into her arms in his place.

"I'll sleep in the spare room, Jess but I can't do this," he said with a vague gesture to the room and the woman on the bed.

Jess went to say something but Fee nuzzled into her neck and she squeaked instead. In that moment, Hils was out of the room and Jess was stuck, wrapped in Fee.

She hummed a soft lullaby and curled into Fee, wishing she had Hils at her back too.

~~oOOo~~

He woke, sweat drenched and panting. The nightmare was one he'd had off and on for years. Somewhere along the line, he’d figured out that it was one of his father's. Bleed over from something that had happened during one of his operational tours. Years later Hilary had met the woman who featured during his training.

In the dream, he could feel his father’s self-loathing for having been attracted to her. The bitter metallic taste of his guilt tainted his father’s memories of the woman’s departure from his life. Because he’d been conflicted over his attraction, he’d ignored warnings she’d made in her professional capacity. Hilary still shuddered in sympathy at his father’s guilt over finding the bodies after the massacre she'd told him was coming.

The woman in question had kept a respectful distance during his time in officer training. She’d skirted around the edges of his course at Sandhurst, but never passed more than a couple words with him during the entire time he was studying. When they graduated, she’d taken him aside and told him with brutal honesty that she both hated and loved his father, and he better not make his father’s mistakes.

Hilary shuddered and rolled his shoulders, skin prickling with dried sweat. With a protector’s instincts, he reached out and felt for the web wrapped around the flat. He winced; Fee's wards were still down, and there was a storm brewing in the other bedroom.

His feet carried him through the flat without thinking and he slipped into their room. Jess was fast asleep, her slight frame wound around Fee in a gesture that was at once suggestive and protective. From where he was he could feel the power curling wild and hot just beneath Fee's skin. He padded slowly to her side of the bed and brushed a hand across Fee's face. Her eyes snapped open and he forced himself to meet her gaze. She stared back at him with a fear that was raw and primal.

"I'm still here, Fee. You're safe. Jess is safe. I need you to go back to sleep, cariad." A bit of the haunting fear left her expression and he kissed her gently. She curled back into Jess and Hilary backed away respectfully to stand guard over them as they slept a while longer. There’ll be no more nightmares tonight, he vowed silently, for any of us.

-

Fee stretched, feeling shaky and nauseous. She really, really detested the resultant symptoms of backlash when she’d over-extended herself this badly. Working slowly and tentatively, she reached out and ran a mental touch along her wardings, flinching as she realised they had remained down all night. She barely restrained herself from scrambling out of bed when she realized why the wards hadn’t re-set on their own. At the foot of their bed, Hilary slept bonelessly draped in the chair. While it didn’t extend very far, his oath was wrapped protectively around them all, feeding minimally off a channel of power that she recognized with shocking clarity. Fee let out a quiet curse, waking Jess in the process.

“Wha’s wrong, love?” Jess muttered

“Hils did something stupid,” she replied grimly. “Noble idiot.”

She pulled at the channel he was tapping, trying to detach his oath from the link between her wards and her geas.

"What's he done?"

"He's supplanted my wards."

"I don't understand," Jess looked at her with confusion.

Fee sighed tiredly. She peeled part of his oath free, and tension crawled up Hilary’s body.

"My wards were set to come back up automatically. I didn't drop them fully yesterday. I just set them to be dormant for as long as the candles on my altar burned. But instead of coming back up, he's latched onto the channel I use to power them, and wrapped us in his oath."

"Still not getting it, love. What'd he do wrong?"

Fee shook her head.

"He shouldn't have been able to come between the power of my geas and my wards in the first place. My geas should have gone wild when it was no longer protecting you. Instead, it's cheerfully accepted Hils' oath as a replacement."

She lifted another segment of her own power free from Hilary’s grasp and missed the shudder that ran through his body.

Hilary bolted upright with a gasp as the final threads of his oath were pulled free. Fee's attention was held by the wards snapping back into place, but Jess caught some of the expression that passed across his face. He scrambled to his feet, running one hand through his sleep-mussed hair.

"I'm sorry! I didn't mean to fall asleep in here. I shouldn't have intruded," he mumbled uncomfortably as he backed quickly out the door.

Before she could follow, Jess heard quick steps on the hardwood floor of the lounge and the slam of the front door. She shot an accusing glare at her lover.

"What have we done to him now, Fee?"

Fee winced.

"I just screwed up, kitten."

"Skye did that to me once, and gods above and below..."

She looked faintly green.

"I should have woken him up first, asked him to let go, but no, I go for the brute force approach."

"What'd it do to him?" Jess asked, trying carefully to keep her tone neutral despite a growing anger with Fee's careless behaviour.

"When Skye pulled my geas off a member of the coven I was protecting it felt like a rejection; a violation and my failure. It was for my own good, but it took me weeks to see that."

Jess couldn't hold herself back any longer. She'd been patient enough for an entire pantheon of saints and angels, but this? This was completely unacceptable.

"Well, now you're going to fix it. I don't care what you have to do, Fee. You owe it to him to make this right. Unless you were trying to sabotage what we've been building?" she said, words offering a cutting challenge that she knew could lay both of them raw.

Fee looked back at her, shaken and dripping with guilt.

"I'm sorry, Jess. That wasn't what I meant-"

"Then you damned well should have thought about it beforehand."

"It's been so long since I've worked metaphysically with someone with a similar oath and power level that it was easy to forget."

She grabbed the wastebasket and threw up, shaking badly.

"You can't afford that sort of mistake, now. It's hard enough trying to make Hilary see straight in the first place. But you throwing a rejection into his psyche? It's entirely possible he won't want to go near either of us ever again after that."

Jess watched dispassionately for a few moments as Fee retched dryly into the bucket. Eventually though, the sound got under her skin and Jess relented. Sitting down on the bed beside Fee, she rubbed her back soothingly and waited for her to be done.

"Unless we're all very careful with each other this isn’t going to work. You've got to learn to talk to us before acting. Assuming there's still an us left after this. You're not alone any more."

Fee tipped her head back.

"I'm trying, kitten, but I've been running solo and on instinct for nearly a decade and it's hard. It doesn't help that Hils’ training is at best rudimentary for his oath and power levels - I've got an urge to beat his father bloody."

"Why?"

"Skye took me on early, when she saw the oath I'd made to protect Mori. Damped it, taught me to manage it and helped me deal with the consequences; but I'd had groundings in the stories Mama had told me long before that. I still screw up regularly. Hils ... that oath he carries is old. It's bound into his blood and his bones and the lands he was born to. Someone deliberately didn't train him and concealed that from the people who could."

Jess winced.

"I think I'm beginning to see your point. It must be a bit like playing with the electrical wiring without having ever been taught which wire leads to ground. Come to think of it, that analogy is rather appropriate here, isn't it?" Jess gave a tiny tight smile at the irony of her own words.

Fee nodded mutely, still feeling shaky with exhaustion and far too raw to really be handling the situation well.

"If only I'd seen it sooner...."

Jess kissed her forehead lightly and slipped out of the bed.

"Shower, love."

Fee stood slowly, waiting for the room to stop tilting before she followed Jess.

"I think today I need to cleanse myself of more than just blood, sweat, and dirt."


	12. Chapter 12

"I booked the day off, kitten. Even when I don't fuck up, I'm always drained after Samhain. I'll be good. The most energetic thing I plan to do is to deconstruct my mistakes."

Jess looked at Fee with concern.

"You sure you're going to be okay on your own? Lester might gripe but I could call in..."

Fee leant in for a quick peck.

"Go to work, love. Try and talk to Hils, if he'll let you, and see what a mess he's made of the rotas. I get the feeling we need to be in Lester's good book for a while - and see if you can put the dossier on Helen back together, baby girl."

"Will do. I'll have to dredge through the old ARC's files before Cutter disappeared. I've a feeling there's things in there which never got properly added into the dossier and I don't know why.”

Jess headed for the shower, stripping out of her knickers and vest as she exited the bedroom. For a moment, Fee was tempted to join her. But then her head reminded her that moving slowly was a much better idea.

When Jess returned, Fee smiled at the teasing show her lover put on, and how easily she accepted her clothing choices. Jess kissed her lightly on the forehead. Fee reset her alarm for lunch time and laughed when Jess threw a stuffed rabbit at her. Impish smile firmly in place, Jess used her phone to take a snap of Fee holding the creature.

"Never know what might come in handy for bribing certain soldiers."

She was out the bedroom door before Fee's deadly accurate aim could return the squishy toy. Jess' laughter floated back to her from the lounge before being blocked out as the front door closed. Fee sighed and retrieved the stuffed bunny that smelt of her lover . She wrapped herself in their duvet, wishing instinct hadn't made her send Jess to work.

~~oOOo~~

 

Hilary’s head flicked up to look at the monitors, and caught sight of Jess's car entering the underground parking. Major Ryan looked at him oddly, when he promptly declared that he was going to conduct a full inventory of the armoury. Normally when he was physically in the ARC, the younger officer would spend most of the time picking his brains, but he'd swear Becker was trying to hide from something.

Curious, Ryan continued to watch as Becker took a hasty but circuitous route down to the armoury. At the same time, Jess Parker entered the building, tracking through at least three intersecting corridors to those that Becker should have taken. Something wasn't quite right. Ryan resolved to patiently wait it out until he could discern the shape of the problem.

Jess smiled when she saw Major Ryan in the main command centre.

"Sir, I'm trying to put the Helen Cutter dossier back together. Captain Becker ran into her on an anomaly shout. Is there any chance you can give me your take on her?"

As she spoke, she was pulling up everything she could find with Helen's name in it, and wincing at some of the emerging holes. The other screen was showing Becker in the armoury.

"Why don't we see what you've got to start with and I'll help fill in the gaps?" Ryan suggested, hoping time spent with the young field coordinator might help him figure out why Becker was avoiding her.

Jess got up and moved across to one of the unoccupied stations, grabbing a chair and bringing it back with her for Ryan. He looked at her with surprise before giving a grateful nod and sinking into it, propping his stick against the side of the ADD. Comma before the word “surprised”.

"Exactly which files have you been reading, Miss Parker?" he asked with an amused tone to his voice.

Jess flushed a little as she tried to come up with good reasons for having been allowed access to some of the files she'd read. She knew there were some she shouldn't have had clearance to view. But at this point it'd been so long ago, she couldn't remember which bits of information came out of which files.

He laughed softly.

"So long as Fee's not the one who showed them to you, it will be our secret..."

"There's a back door into the archives with the way the systems are set up."

"One of Connor's, I presume?"

She shook her head. "It's a problem with one of the networks. I got Connor to help me patch it, but we still have access. I don't use it but I was having such a problem believing what they wanted me to do, and understanding how Hi...Becker and Fee thought that I pulled a random sample of reports."

He pinched the bridge of his nose briefly. "You got some of their pre-ARC reports, as well didn't you?"

"I'm not certain, but I believe so. Why did Helen Cutter have a dossier before the ARC existed?"

"I can't go into detail, but the Ministry did have her under observation before her disappearance."

Though she looked curious, Jess knew better than to pursue the conversation any further.

Jess flicked through to the next group of documents, pulling several photos of Helen side-by-side. Put in chronological order of sightings, Helen appeared to age then become younger once again.

"The surveillance footage from the most recent anomaly showed Helen looking even younger than this," she pointed.

"We knew she was travelling through the anomalies." He looked more closely at the photos.

"She looks like she's older than the one we ran into while we were still operating out of the Home Office, but she's definitely younger than the one who killed Cutter."

He reeled off a file reference.

"Put those three photos next to each other."

Jess did as asked, and the difference between the three Helens was quite obvious.

"I know there should be references to her in the following files.”

He proceeded to reel off a list of other file names which Jess brought up to review on the screen before them.

Jess frowned. "Two of those have no mention of her."

Ryan shook his head.

"Trust me, she's not named, but it's her. Pull up the files and you'll see what I mean. It doesn't make any sense unless it was one of Helen's appearances."

Dutifully, Jess opened the files in question and began quickly skimming them for content. Before she'd even gotten three quarters done with the first file, she was nodding her head in agreement.

"Good girl," Ryan beamed his approval. "You've spotted the trick of her well enough to see it even without names. Keep doing that and you might find more of these in unexpected places. And if anyone asks, I gave you permission to be in that series of files. Now why haven't I seen Captain Black today?"

Jess fidgeted a bit before answering.

"She's taken a personal day,” she responded evasively.

He looked at her. "I know something odd is going on, Jess. The rota normally has her and Becker on at the same time. And suddenly I get them on opposite patterns. I know they are one of the most co-ordinated teams I've seen in the field. Something has shifted or changed and he's avoiding both of you."

Jess stared intently at the files on the monitor, chewing her lower lip nervously.

"I haven't seen Becker today. No clue what's wrong with him."

Ryan barked a laugh.

"You'd make a lousy bridge player, Miss Parker."

Jess jumped at his laugh and her expression was suddenly unguarded. He didn't know what it was, but something was there, lurking just beneath the calmly polished exterior of the woman.

"Have you met his father? Or know about Fee's uncanny luck, Sir?"

"Certainly, I met General Becker shortly before my first deployment. And as for Fiona's unerring skills, I must admit, I've always wondered.” He raised an eyebrow at her inquisitively. "But what have the two of those to do with each other?"

"We ran into a bit of an issue to do with something he taught his son, and some of Fee's odder skills. And he took it the wrong way."

"Sounds a bit odd. Given the high calibre of his own abilities, I would have expected General Becker to have made certain his son was well prepared. Fee, on the other hand... I've seen her pull a fair amount of unorthodox maneuvers in my time. Care to elaborate on what exactly she did?"

Jess grimaced. "On second thought, I don't think it really bears discussion, Major. I'm sure they'll sort it out between themselves."

"If it has anything to do with that mark on her wrist ..."

Jess nodded sharply.

"I'll leave it alone for the moment, Miss Parker, but I will be overriding his rota patterns. They currently make little to no sense."

"Thank you, sir," she whispered.

"Don't let me regret this. Now I need to talk to Lester, and you have a dossier to compile."

He picked up his stick, and stood carefully.

"And until they get this sorted, you can tell Fee the explosives are strictly off limits."

He tossed over his shoulder as he stumped off.

Jess shook her head and went back to sorting through the files. Now that she knew what she was looking for, she was going to have to formulate search criteria to find Helen Cutter's past without ever seeing her name. If she put together that algorithm with those words, and that ... she smiled and set to work.

~~oOOo~~

Jess kept an eye on the camera feeds, waiting for Hils to leave his self-declared sanctuary. When she saw him re-enter his office, she set the anomaly detector to automatic, and traced the doodle she'd been working on. Taking a deep breath, she pushed herself up, and headed for the SF officers' suite.

Her heels clicked loudly on the linoleum tile. Jess winced, knowing there was no way she was going to sneak up on Hilary given her choice of footwear. Worried that he'd try to escape when he heard her coming, she sped up her steps, frustration and anger at both Fee and Hilary fueling her pace.

One of the lieutenants looked up when she barged through the common area, and moved slowly out of her line of sight and knocked on Major Ryan's door.

When Jess stalked into his office, Hilary thought she was Fee for a moment with the crackle she was carrying. He was unnerved to see all 5'2" of Jess trying to block the doorway.

"She knows she fucked up. But you had effectively decided to suck on a live wire, and she did what her instincts told her to. It was not intended as a rejection, Hilary."

Hilary looked fury at her and stalked across the room to shove the door closed behind her.

"I'll thank you to have a modicum of discretion, Jess. We are not going to discuss this. But if we were, we certainly wouldn't be doing so out in the open where the entire unit can hear."

"And you were discreet, with the altered rotas and avoiding me this morning? There was only one technician within earshot and he knows how badly I can fuck him over. Major Ryan has already figured out there is a problem. And most people would think that was a metaphor anyway."

Hilary paced back and forth beside the desk. Jess imagined she could feel his fury every time he got close to her. But beneath it, if his eyes were anything to go by, was something wounded and raw. Fee had messed things up beyond belief earlier, but that just didn't account for how much pain he appeared to be holding onto.

Hilary ran a hand through his dark brown hair, mussing it in a way that Jess would have found endearing at any other time. In a flash of inspiration, she remembered a random but from one of her psych classes in uni. The professor had told them that defusing anger sometimes took nothing more than the right body language or the right distraction.

"Hils, did your father ever give you any training?"

He looked at her for a moment, puzzled.

"I'm not sure I understand what you're asking. My father helped me with my studies occasionally when he was home. But when I at Sandhurst he left me to those more qualified to instruct."

"That’s not what I meant,” Jess huffed in frustration. “Fee said something after you left about how her geas is a little different, but Skye had her in training for years after she made its base oath."

Hilary looked at her and she could see that he was thinking, some of the anger draining off as he tried to comprehend her statement.

“If you’re asking whether my father ever trained me on how to wield the family’s oath, the answer is no. I always assumed it was just instinctive.”

Jess looked at him with a growing understanding. She understood Fee's urge to kill Hils’ father.

“God, what a mess. At least I'm working from the assumption that I don't know anything about this sort of metaphysical talent. You've got one and no one ever bothered to show you what to do with it. It'd be like putting a gun into the hands of a toddler and not telling them it was dangerous."

Hilary grimaced at the analogy, but her could see her point.

"My grandfather offered to take me for the summer holidays, and I know he said he had things he wanted to teach me, but my father refused him permission."

"If this oath is so old, have you any idea why your father and grandfather disagreed?”

Hilary finally stopped pacing and settled onto the corner of his desk, disordering a neatly stacked pile of reports but not caring.

"I have no idea. My best guess is something to do with my grandmother, but I don't know."

"Any chance you could go directly to your grandparents and ask them?"

"One of those ghosts last night was my grandfather, Jess."

The raw wounded look was back in his eyes again. Jess resisted the urge to pull him into a hug, settling instead for briefly clasping his hand in sympathy.

"I'm sorry," she murmured with quiet sincerity.

Hilary looked back at her gratefully and took a deep breath.

"It was a long time ago."

"What about your grandmother?" Jess asked hesitantly.

"I think she's dead. I stopped getting letters from her about the time my grandfather died."

Jess' head snapped up. She looked at him shrewdly.

"How long ago was that? How old were you? Is there any chance she sent you letters but your father's kept them from you?"

Out of the corner of her eye, Jess saw Major Ryan in the outer common area. He appeared to be making tea but every so often he'd look toward the closed door of the captains' office.

"It would have been about seven years ago, “he started. “Fee and I were both at Sandhurst. My grandfather died, and my father refused to let me be told - or pulled out of our final exercise for his funeral. I found out afterwards. I sent her a letter, but she never replied. I suppose it's possible he had my post filtered. The rare times Fee sent me letters they always took a while to appear - we ended up using our work email accounts to talk."

Jess looked a fury and for a moment Hilary could almost feel the anger radiating off the tiny woman.

"There's something not entirely right going on there. I promise you we'll get to the bottom of it. For now though, let's start by figuring out if your grandmother is even still alive."

Jess rose from her chair and was around the other side of his desk before he'd had a moment to object. Efficiently logging into his computer, she patched through to her own account, gaining specified clearances elsewhere that she knew he wasn't party to.

"What was your grandmother's full name?"

"Rose," he said quickly. "Well, Rosemary Eugenia Selsdon, properly."

Jess was typing before he'd even finished giving her the information.

"Are you sure that name is right?”

He nodded.

"When was your father born?"

"1956," he responded quickly.

"That can’t be right. Rosemary married your grandfather in 1970 and I have no death certificate for her."

She hit another couple of keys.

"What I've got is a marriage certificate for an Erin and Hilary Becker, a birth certificate for your father, and a death certificate for her in 1969. Then there's Rosemary's marriage certificate in 1970."

Jess opened another window, and ripped through the encryption on the census database.

"Rosemary is shown, under that name with her profession as a nursemaid, living with a Hilary and Erin Becker in 1961."

Hilary looked at her, stunned.

"I need to see, Jess."

She rose gracefully from his chair to allow him to look at the records for himself.

"She wasn't my grandmother," he said with slow pain.

"Not wasn't, Hils," Jess pointed out gently. "Isn't. She's still alive."

"She's here," he whispered. "She's been right here just outside London all along."

Jess jumped in shock as his fist slammed down in sudden violence on top of the desk.

"Let me dig a little deeper, love. The last address I have for her at the moment is from 2001."

He looked at her sharply, wondering why she'd called him love, but let it go for the moment.

"My father would have my guts for garters if he knew I was poking around in this."

Jess nodded sympathetically and added another layer of obfuscation to her carefully hidden worm program.

"You know, she can still be your grandmother, even if she's not related by blood. Leave that program running in the background. It should find her address eventually,” she reminded him.

He nodded, and watched almost appreciatively as she rose from her seat. She caught his expression.

"You are allowed to look, Hils. Remember?"

He shook his head in denial but she caught his chin and held him steady.

"We both still want you with us. I know that Fee messed up. Sometimes she runs on instinct, doesn't think things through. Please, give us a chance?"

She couldn't read the expression that flitted across his face. And he hesitated.

"I'll try, Jess. But I'm more broken than I want to admit to. I don't need to be shattered ..."

~~oOOo~~

Major Ryan watched the little field co-ordinator stalk out of the Captains' office and waited for five minutes before letting himself in, walking awkwardly as he carried two mugs of tea.

"You look like you could use one of these, Captain. Mind telling me what all that was about? Miss Parker rarely gets dressed down by Lester, much less by you."

He looked across at his technical superior.

"I think that was closer to her dressing me down, actually, Sir."

"Really?" Ryan said with heavy sarcasm. "From what I could see it looked quite the opposite. I'll thank you to keep your temper in check, Hilary. Your father's reputation precedes you. And if you want to continue under my command, I'll remind you just this once to keep that family trait under wraps."

He winced.

"I've been target of his temper more than once, sir - especially when I tried to distract him from Fee."

"Speaking of Captain Black, you two appeared rather cozy the other day."

"Old patterns, sir. We backslid into the routines we were used to in theatre."

"Mmm. I've had plenty of men whom I worked with closely enough to understand that. Whatever it is, just make certain it doesn't turn personal."

Becker took a sip of the mug of his tea, and Major Ryan looked at him.

"You two never officially worked together. Not according to the reports I have access to."

“The EOD specialist I have working with me for half of my second tour was Fee. I burnt through a lot of favours to get her name scrubbed from the reports to protect her from my father. He has an irrational dislike for her. She got a very good report, her promotion and a recommendation for Support Group. I got sucked in here as my reward.”

“That explains more than I expected. Is that your former team I received the note about this morning?”

He nodded.

“Do you have anything to support your suspicions?”

“Just a set of instincts I’m finally learning to trust, sir.”

Ryan barely avoided rolling his eyes, and pushed himself to his feet.

“Just sort out the mess with Fee, Hilary. And if you hurt Jess, I’ll have you back within your father’s sights in less time than it takes you to load that Mossberg you’re so fond of.”

He turned at the doorway.

“And I’m reverting the rotas to the normal pattern. This month’s variation made no sense at all - and was rather cruel to Jess.”

He shut the door rather forcefully, and Becker allowed his head to rest in his hands. How the hell had he allowed himself to get this messed up? And when did his superior officer gain a soft spot for his Jess?

~~oOOo~~

There was already a stool of the appropriate height waiting next to Jess’s workstation when he returned to the command centre. He perched on it gratefully, and stretched his game leg carefully.

“So what was my Adjutant ripping into you over, Miss Parker?”

Jess switched the screen display off the CCTV feed to look up at him but not before Maj. Ryan had seen what she’d been watching; the firing range, where Captain Becker and his men were presently running re-certification practice.

“I took Fee’s part in an argument when I shouldn’t have,” she responded evasively before changing the subject. “Does this look like a more complete file on Dr. Cutter, now?”

He looked at the two timelines - both the linear one, and Helen’s personal one.

“Send me a copy on my S account and I’ll pull it apart at Hereford tomorrow. Now pull up the duty rotations for the next month, and let’s get the mess fixed. Can you access Fee’s on-call dates for EOD, and Hilary’s meetings at the other London site?”

Jess nodded and threw the current rotas, the last month’s, and the two other requested documents up on the larger screen.

“What did Fiona do?”

Jess didn't look at him, choosing instead to stay focused on the screen before her as she replied.

"Philosophical difference, sir."

"Care to elaborate?"

"Captain Becker wasn't pleased with her use of force in taking out those coelophysis the other day. He said it was typical flamboyancy on her part, but not strictly necessary."

Ryan nodded but continued to scrutinize her closely as she worked.

"And how exactly did you end up in the middle of that, Miss Parker?"

"I gave Captain Becker the supply requisition for Fee's kit. It was one of a larger batch of papers and apparently he felt that I should have brought it to his attention before he signed it."

"Exactly what did she requisition this time and from whom?"

“A couple of new toys that are supposed to still be in testing. She did make good use of them, but judging by their banter, he didn't realise she had them."

He sighed. “Fiona and experimental toys in the field? I can understand some of his frustration. I really must reconstruct those files he had scrubbed from theatre."

Jess looked over at him shyly. "I can get you those files by day's end if you'd like, sir."

Ryan raised an eyebrow at her but didn't ask. Even after only a few months of working with Jess, he already knew better.

“If you could dump those to my e-mail with the Helen Cutter files, I would be grateful. So what specifically did Hilary object to in your behaviour?”

"He said I should know her well enough by now to see when she's playing fast and loose."

"Why on earth would he have expected you to see that requisition and consider it attention-worthy? Given their apparent familiarity, one would think he'd know her well enough himself," Major Ryan replied quietly.

Jess looked back at the screen and Ryan watched her work for a few moments before deciding to change his tack.

"I’ve warned Hilary against taking his frustrations out on Fiona in such a punitive fashion in future. It was very unlike him but still, it shows a worrisome lack of judgment on his part.”

“Normally I wouldn’t have objected, but when he changed the rota he put Fee and I on opposite shifts during a month of the year that she finds very difficult. I pointed this out to him. And before you ask, she didn't want me to."

“Wanted to beard the lion for herself, eh?”

“Something like, sir. But given she’s on medical leave; I took it upon myself to approach Captain Becker myself and got bitten for my troubles.”

“Well next time something like this comes to your attention, please, speak to me first. I consider it part of my duties to see that the families and partners of my officers are treated fairly, regardless of race, gender, or faith. I would do the same for Captain Becker if he had family aside from the General and I consider myself to owe nothing less to you and Fiona, even if you have yet to formalize your arrangement.”

Jess’ startled eyes met his for just a moment before she looked back down at her hands on the keyboard, a flush creeping up the back of her neck.

Rather than push the issue any farther, Maj. Ryan rose slowly, got a good grip on the handle of his stick, and walked away, his uneven gait an oddly syncopated three quarter time as it echoed down the hall.


	13. Chapter 13

Fee stumbled into the ARC, following sleepily in Jess’s wake, and pouring another energy drink down her throat. Her whole body ached - the nearest she could get to how she currently felt was the memory of being caught on the edge of an IED explosion that had thrown her a dozen feet - because an idiot hadn’t put his feet where she told him to.

She planted a sleepy kiss on Jess at her command station, and stumbled off towards her office.

“Jess, are you sure she should be in work?” Jess turned her head sharply and caught the look of concern on Ditzy’s face.

“She wouldn’t listen when I asked her to stay home. Insisted that she needed to be here.” 

“I’ll go and check on her. If she’s still having problems I can sign her off sick again.”   Though at some point, I’m going to want an explanation as to WHY I’m signing her off.... the duty medic added to himself.

~oOOo~

He braced himself for his head being bitten off but knocked on the door to the captains’ shared office and slipped inside. Two of the three desks were occupied, even if it did look like Fee had fallen asleep at her terminal.

Becker looked up.

“I was about to call you, David. She walked in, sat down and promptly fell asleep.”

“Give me a bit of space, boss. Unless you want to carry her to the infirmary?” The dark-haired captain looked a surprisingly uncomfortable with the idea and Ditzy filed the expression away for future consideration. Hilary took a moment, locked his computer, and exited the office.  As he closed the blinds on the window Ditzy could see that the other man had only gone to the outer common area normally used by the lieutenants.

The blond medic crouched down next to Fee’s desk and touched her arm gently.  Her skin was feverishly warm and he pulled back with a start at the jolt of static electricity that zinged through his fingertips.  

“Ma’am, I need you to wake up now.” 

Fee moaned an incoherent protest.

Ditzy clicked his fingers and she flinched.  “Captain Black, wake up.” 

The red haired woman opened her eyes, and stared at him without really focusing. 

“Fiona, other than being exhausted have you been throwing up, been achy and fuzz headed?”

“Feels like I tried a two-step with a Molotov and m’head’s muddy as the bottom of a creek. Haven’t eaten anything since I lost m’lunch yesterday.”  It took Ditz a moment to puzzle through the sudden honeyed thickness of her Tennessee accent.

He sighed. “Sounds like you’ve got the flu, though you’re probably in the recovery phase. I’m going to get someone to take you home.”  He made a mental note to check the rest of the rota’s records for up to date flu vaccinations.

Tossing her jacket loosely around her shoulders, the medic looped one arm around her waist and levered her up to her feet.

“No more coffee, and straight to sleep soon as you get home. I’ll sign you off for another three days.  This time when you’re due back you come to see me straight away and I’ll decide whether or not you’re fit to work.  And I’m giving your sick chit to Miss Parker so no cheating, or I’ll know of it.”

Fee’s lack of response had him just as concerned as the temporary thickening of her accent.  Ditzy was well aware that this was perhaps only the second time he’d heard her accent slip into the cadence of her childhood.  

When the office door opened once again, Hilary was there to thread his arm around Fee’s body with a possessive familiarity that made Ditzy give him yet another long considering look.  For his part, Hilary was too busy talking quietly to Fee as he coaxed her into walking mostly on her own with a gentleness that surprised the medic.  Ditz offered a steadying hand to the redheaded captain as the senior officer stopped for a moment to tap the comm by the door.

“Jess?  We’re sending Fee home again.  She passed out at the desk as soon as she got down here. Can you run her back to your flat?”

Ditzy could hear Jess harrumph with irritation at the other end of the comms.  

“I told her she wasn’t ready to come back to work yet.  She was asleep amidst a pile of books when I got home yesterday. I think she’d been -”

Hilary cut her off before she could finish her usual ramble.  “Yes well, I’m sure she just needs more time to recover from that  flu  she’s had.” 

The strange emphasis he put on the word had Ditzy raising an eyebrow, but he didn’t have time to ask more as Hilary re-took his supportive position on Fee’s other side.

“Just stay awake a little longer, Fee, then you can sleep on the drive back to your flat.  Jess, why don’t you meet us down at the car park.”

Fee blinked at him slowly but she managed to put one foot in front of the other again as they began the trip back to the car park.

Showing her usual efficiency, Jess had already retrieved the car and brought it around to the side entrance.  Hilary helped Fee into the passenger’s seat, tucking her jacket gently around her body once the seat belt was locked into place.  

He tucked a stray lock of hair behind her ear, whispering quietly, “Go home and rest, Fee.  I’ll watch over Jess for you and I promise we’ll talk as soon as you’re recovered.”

Fee’s eyes still wouldn’t focus properly but she gave him an unsteady nod of acknowledgement.  Hilary could see the tow-headed medic watching them curiously as he closed the car door and waved Jess off.  Rather than deal with questions he was unprepared to answer, he stalked off toward his office once again.  Much to his chagrin, he found that Ditzy remained doggedly on his heels, following all the way back to the section of the ARC designated for use by the SAS squadron.

With a sigh, Hilary gestured for the medic to accompany him into the captains’ shared office, closing the door firmly behind them.  Sitting down behind his desk once again, Hilary finally looked Ditzy in the eye, seeing all the unanswered questions he’d been dreading. With a gesture, he gave the other man permission to speak freely.

“If Captain Black has the flu, then I need to go back for retraining but I’ll be buggered if I can tell you what’s actually wrong with her,”  he stated with a look of frustration.  “Her symptoms are back to front.  Coming from a different woman I would have seriously considered a possible pregnancy.”

Becker looked startled yet again and Ditzy paused in the midst of his ramblings.  

“Go on,”  Hilary encouraged in the hopes of steering the medic away from questions even closer to home than he could possibly have imagined.

“It’s like an incident I dealt with in theatre.  A major named Anthony Tremayne.  I believe he’s related to one of our attached lieutenants?   The man had similar symptoms and tried to avoid explaining them, same as you’ve done for Captain Black.    He recovered quickly enough, but I never did get an explanation.”

Becker looked up from where he’d been hastily scribbling down a note on the pad by his phone.

“You’d have to ask Lieutenant Tremayne about her relation to the major as I’ve never heard of the man before.  Was there anything else, Lieutenant?”

Becker had pasted a bland facade over his previously open expression.  His features were carefully schooled once again to give away none of their previous clues.  

Ditzy chewed his lip before plunging onward.  

“Captain, none of that explains why being near you and Captain Black lately makes me feel like I’ve put my finger in a live socket.   You seem to know exactly what we’re dealing with and frankly I don’t like being left in the dark, sir.  Especially not within my own area of expertise.” 

“You’d be better off asking answers of Fee herself.” Hilary sighed tiredly. “Easiest explanation is that she had an adverse reaction to the combination of the forest anomaly site and something she later did at home. While I recognize what Fee’s done to herself, I  have never pushed myself to the point of suffering the same set of symptoms.  Just accept that you’re doing everything right so far in treating this like a case of the flu.”

“Respectfully, sir, I need more details.  What was she doing? Should I be requesting a drugs test to be done on her?”

“No.  Absolutely not.“ Hilary said as he quickly straightened in his chair.  “You just overstepped the mark, Lieutenant. Just treat this as a form of fatigue and let it go.  She’ll be back at work within the next few days.”  

Ditzy looked at him before rising from his chair to sketch a salute before leaving.  He was well aware that he had pushed too far.  One warning was all he’d get before the matter turned ugly.  He satisfied himself with the knowledge that Captain Becker had still given away more than he’d probably intended to – including the fact he may one day suffer the same symptoms.  

Retreating to his own office attached to the infirmary, Ditzy’s thoughts were interrupted by the phone ringing. The unique tone indicated that the call was from another military number so he picked it up reluctantly.

“Lieutenant Owen speaking.”

“Have you seen Captain Black today?” Major Ryan asked without preamble.

“Only briefly, sir. She came in this morning but I sent her home again as she appears to be suffering from the flu.”

“Grand,” the older man grumbled acerbically. “ I’ve got R&D breathing down my neck for feedback on those toys she used on the anomaly shout a couple days ago.  Any idea how long she’ll be out for?”

“Not entirely certain, though this looks a lot like something I saw in theatre.   I need access to Major Anthony Tremayne’s medical files to cross-check, sir. Any chance you could have those sent over?  I might be able to tell you more once I’ve seen them.”

“Tony, eh?  I’ll have my PA pull his files and send you a copy.  Speaking of which, didn’t I see that his daughter, Mary, shifted into Lyle’s platoon as one of his specialists?  How’s she holding up?”

“Lieutenant Tremayne seems to be taking to the work fairly easily, sir.  She’s been here a few weeks already and I haven’t seen her yet.  The good ones don’t usually end up on my bed for for the first couple months because they actually  listen to their orders however bizarre they might sound.”

“Sounds just like her dad,” Major Ryan chuckled.

“Speaking of which, I really do need to see Major Tremayne’s records.  He’s the only individual I know of that has suffered the same symptoms in similar circumstances.  Something the captain said suggests that his father may have suffered similar episodes, but General Becker’s records are locked down tighter than the crown jewels.”

“Come to think of it, the two of them did end up under observation by the medics together fairly often while they were in theatre.” Ryan said in a speculative tone.  

Ditzy knew that tone all too well.  He’d gotten the major to thinking and when the man got to thinking he rarely let go until he’d followed the thought to a logical end point.  Realizing the potential trouble he’d unleashed, Ditz hoped fervently that he wasn’t about to ruin the careers of two highly competent officers in pursuit of nothing more than a wild hare.

“Captain Becker seems much closer to Captain Black than he was when she first arrived.  But judging by the theatre records I have access to it’s the same kind of relationship I would expect from any of the sections who’ve done a full tour together,” the medic said in an attempt to turn the wild hare back into dust and bramble.  “At the moment, my only concern would be their possessiveness over each other and how that’s going to affect Fee’s relationship with Miss Parker. ” 

“Do you think there’s cause for concern, David?” Ryan asked quickly.

“To be honest, boss, no.   There are other individuals in the squadron I would put far ahead of both captains on that score.  And I can’t see either of them willingly doing something that would hurt Jess.”

“Is that your professional opinion, Lieutenant, or just your gut talking?”  Ryan asked shrewdly.

“A bit of both,” Ditz said.  A few moments later he absentmindedly added, “If something strange is going on I suspect they will have both asked Jess’ permission.”

“Any indication, that they have, or is that still instinct talking.”

“I’ve nothing solid to go on, sir.  Just bits and scraps that don’t add up.”

“Well then, for the moment, we’d best leave off idle speculations on the lives of my officers, now shouldn’t we?” Ryan bit back with his usual caustic wit before ending the call.

The medic jolted in surprise as the phone beeped abruptly.  He glared at it, shocked that Ryan had hung up on him.  Much as he wanted answers, there was nothing he could do now but wait.  He’d already pushed one officer too far today.  Doing so twice would be beyond foolhardy.   He could only hope that Major Ryan sent over the records he’d requested regardless of his irritation.  Perhaps if he combined those records with the ones he had for Captain Black, he’d find the hints he needed to piece together a more complete picture.

~~oOOo~~

The video-conferencing icon on James Lester’s computer blinked with an incoming call.   Lester clicked on it.  He took one look at Major Ryan’s face before pulling the whiskey out of his cupboard. 

“This is going to be one of  those conversations , isn’t it? I have a driver to take me home tonight. Do you mind if I have a drink, Tom?”

On screen, Major Ryan held up a glass of his own by way of salute before he continued speaking.   “There’s something fairly odd going on, James.  I’ve noticed it myself but today one of my staff medics ran me through a series of questions I can’t answer.”

“Wait, wait, don’t tell me; Captains Becker, Black, and Miss Parker,” Lester’s voice was heavy with irony as he jumped in with all the false eagerness of a schoolboy confident in having learnt the lessons before class.

Ryan tapped his nose in acknowledgement before Lester continued.

“You’re not the only one to have noticed, Tom.  I’ve been idly wondering whether both captains are slowly going round the bend. Remember, I’ve had plenty of experience on that score having dealt with Professor Cutter and Miss Johnson.”

Ryan stifled a laugh though his expression was a bit haunted at the mention of colleagues since consigned to dust and maggots.  He sighed heavily.

“Do you want to deal with this as a personnel matter, James, or are we looking at the need for official disciplinary action?  They’re two of my best officers. Probably two of the only ones I can see going to higher commands - and that’s rare at the moment.  I’d like to avoid marring their records if we can.”

“I take it you’ve got plans for those two, Tom?”

“If Hilary comes off the promotions board well next autumn, we will leave him in place as your security chief but he’ll receive due a promotion to the rank of major.  There’s talk of giving him command of the new UK based Counter Terrorism Squadron we're forming. Even a rumour that Lyle may get promoted into the second in command post if he can carry on keeping his nose clean.  Most of the core for that squadron has been rotating through the ARC right under your nose for close to half a year now.”

“And here I thought I’d just been lucky in getting all the suicidally brave ones recently,”  Lester shot back with irritation.  He didn’t like it when Home Office played these sorts of games behind his back.  The fact that Major Ryan had known about it and said nothing only made him more irritable.

“Before your hackles rise any further, James, Home Office isn’t playing solo this time round.  The Regiment is dealing with a crap hand dealt by both Home Office and the Ministry of Defence. You’ve had years of poaching whichever team was available.  Now we need the squadron in place before the Olympics and your operation is an ideal place to host its headquarters.”

“Promotions and politics aside, there’s something more than a little strange going on. I know Lieutenant Owen spoke to Captain Becker earlier.”

Ryan nodded.  “Yes.  And now he’s asked for a copy of Major Tremayne’s records from theatre.  I know the man had  uncanny  luck. Rather like Fiona’s.”

“Dog with a new bone, is it?” Lester chuckled at the image. “Has Lieutenant Owen said anything else? Anything you can share, I mean.”

“No,” Ryan replied.  “He’s frustrated but he said Becker clammed up.  Told him to write it off as flu.”

“Please tell me that Captain Black isn’t pregnant?” Lester pleaded, pinching the bridge of his nose to stem the growing headache. “She’s acting far too much like my broody ex-wife for comfort.”

“Given she has your delicate little field coordinator as her partner, I seriously doubt it!  Unless you think that she and Captain Becker -” Ryan let the sentence trail off into suggestive silence.

“Cheating?  I doubt it.  For one thing, Jess seems to be just as close to Becker as Captain Black is lately.  My worry?” Lester winced in discomfort before continuing.  “The latest fad seems to be for lesbian couples to ask friends to  donate .”  

The inflection he used on the last word left little to the imagination and this time Ryan was unable to suppress his amusement.  

“Fiona bloody well knows the rules and if you’ve seen all her records you know she won’t risk pregnancy during a post requiring time in the field.  Though for the record, I did ask Ditzy to check, just in case.  Besides, her records show that she’s got a long term birth control implant not due to be replaced for months yet.” 

James Lester shook his head.  He’d never entirely become accustomed to how little privacy was had by the military men and women under his command.  Sometimes he sincerely missed the days when a man’s privacy was respected above all else.

“So if it’s not an affair and it’s not pregnancy, what in hell’s name are those three up to?” Lester asked tiredly.

“Not a clue.” Ryan replied as he knocked back the last of his drink. 

Lester took another sip, rolling the smoky flavor of whiskey around his mouth before swallowing.  

“Which leads us right back where we started.  Do we leave them to handle this in private or drag whatever it is out of them on threat of disciplinary action?”

“I suspect that trying to drag it out of them will just end badly.  I’m fairly certain Hillary has spent at least the last two years defending Fiona against his father.  Why he’s doing so is anyone’s guess.  But I know we can’t throw much more at them then General Becker already has.  If he felt it was necessary to manipulate his own son in such a fashion then that odd something extends beyond just the unholy trio we’re so privileged to command.”

“I don’t like surprises any more than you do, Tom,” he said has he polished off the whiskey, setting his glass down on the worktop with a faint tink.

“My hands have been tied, James. It’s only been recently that the games have got far enough I can discuss them outside of the Regiment. Now how did you want to deal with our mutual trouble children?”

Lester gave a gallic shrug, body becoming looser as the drink finally released him from the demons of his day.

“Leave it alone for now. They’re all performing within expectation of their duties and Jess hasn’t complained about their newfound closeness.”

Ryan’s head could be seen nodding at the other end of the call.   

“It’s worth noting though that Fee and Jess are now listed as Becker’s next of kin ahead of his father. Likewise Fee at least has changed her records to list Becker as her secondary contact. I wouldn’t be surprised to find Jess has done the same.”

Lester raised an eyebrow at that revelation.  A couple of keystrokes and he had Jess’ personnel file up on screen reflecting the same changes.

“If we’d made a wager on it, I’d owe you a new bottle of whiskey right now, major.”

Ryan laughed.  The sound made Lester momentarily long for the days when when Ryan was nothing more than a captain himself and the ARC had been a more relaxed place.  Those days, those people, all of them irretrievably gone.  He shook his head at the maudlin, resolving to avoid any more late nights at the office this week with nothing but a bottle for company.

“To old friends, Tom?”

Ryan held up his glass in token even though it contained nothing but ice.

“In memoriam, James. I’ll see you when I’m next due in Main Building.”

The video conference window went dark once again.  James Lester buzzed his driver requesting the car pick him if up in twenty minutes.  Just enough time to tidy up and make his customary walk through the deserted corridors.  Despite friends and enemies long gone, that tradition at least still remained.


	14. Chapter 14

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Fee returns to work, poppies bloom and the Captains spot a worrying pattern in theatre.

Per orders, Fee went straight to medical when she returned to duty again three days later. Jess stayed to watch critically as Ditzy looked her partner over.

"Really, kitten, you don't need to coddle me."

"It's not you I'm worrying about, Fee," Jess whispered as she nodded toward the office where Ditzy had disappeared to run some tests.

“What's the problem, kitten?"

“He’s been asking awkward questions."

"Care to elaborate?" Fee looked at her curiously, feet swiping the floor idly as she waited on the exam table.

“Lieutenant Owen seems to be putting two and two together quite well. He knows there is something odd going on."

Fee laughed carelessly.

"I'd be worried if he weren't investigating given the odd circumstances under which my 'sick leave' occurred."

Jess shook her head.

“There is something more to it than that. He's received some records from theatre and he's managed to keep me from accessing them."

"Professional pride wounded, Jess? Stop worrying. He’ll let it drop soon enough so long as we both act normally. Remember, there's nothing tangible here for him to report. Just smoke and mirrors."

Sighing, Jess had to agree. That didn’t prevent her from taking the precaution of one hand resting lightly on Fee’s knee throughout her examination. It was a bid to avoid the young medic noticing the subtle energy still coursing across her lover’s skin. Fee glanced at Jess a couple of times in annoyance but it was worth it when Ditzy finally signed off on her return paperwork and told her to get dressed once again.

“The field only in emergencies please ma'am, but otherwise you are fit for duty."

Fee sketched a salute and waited for Ditz to leave the exam area so she could change.

"Enough baby-sitting now, Jess," Fee said as she slipped into her trousers. "Go get some work done. I'll be fine."

With a quick peck on the cheek Jess slipped out of the office heading for her duty station. Before she'd made it half a dozen steps she realized she needed to speak to Hilary before Fee made it to the SAS offices. She owed him an apology and he deserved a warning. Jess turned round and headed the opposite direction, heels clicking furiously against the floor of the empty corridor.

Slipping into the shared office, Jess locked the door behind her. Hilary looked up in surprise but an instant later the bland professional mask slammed into place again.

"I'm not here to make things worse, Hilary, truly. I thought perhaps we could talk before Fee comes back down from medical."

His expression remained carefully neutral. It hurt Jess to see the walls raised to keep her out once more but she was intent on easing him back out of that shell.

"She's tired, and she's ragged. By normal definitions, she functioning, but she's got no filters left on what comes out of her mouth. Her behaviour is a bit erratic and she’s rather more talkative than is probably safe."

He nodded his understanding. "I think I’ve seen her like this before. It happened once or twice while we were in theatre together. I'll try to keep the boys away from her as best I can."

Jess looked grateful. “Thank you. Despite what she might think, I’d also say she's in no state to be sparring with them either. Which is exactly what will happen if she opens her mouth right now. Does she still owe you that paperwork from last week? I know that the major was muttering about reports on the toys she signed out."

"That she does and it should manage to keep her tied to the desk for the majority of today. If that doesn't suffice, I'll take her to the mat myself for a bit of sparring. See if I can run her ragged," he scoffed.

Jess grimaced, but nodded her agreement.

“Whatever you need to do to keep her out of trouble.” A moment later she added quietly, “I trust you, Hils.”

Hilary looked up at her with a guarded but surprised expression.

“To be completely honest, Jess, I’m not entirely certain why you do. From your perspective all of this must be rather unsettling. A man who’s known your lover far longer than you have comes into her life. You know damned well that he’s attracted to her and she to him. Why you don’t feel threatened is a complete mystery to me.”

“Because I’ve spent the last three months wrapped in her geas and when I think about it, I know with absolute certainty that Fee loves me. Loving more than one person doesn’t diminish that love.”

His expression was becoming less carefully held by inches and Jess breathed a sigh of relief. At present, confusion was written in broad strokes across his serious hazel eyes and generous lips.

“How could you possibly not fear that I would take her away from you?”

“Because I trust Fee, and I trust you. Neither of you would do something underhanded or dishonourable. Besides, I feel the same was she does; we care for you far more than I think you are comfortable admitting.”

Hilary stared at her for a long time before shaking his head and dropping his gaze back to his hands on the desk.

“That doesn’t make any sense to me.”

“Does your grandfather having met and married another woman mean he loved your biological grandmother any less?” Jess asked.

“No,” he replied slowly.

“What if I told you he’d loved them both at the same time? What if I told you they’d been in his life together for quite a while before your grandmother died?”

He hesitated briefly.

“I’d want to know more, to have proof. I can’t see my grandfather doing anything dishonourable.”

“What if they all chose to make a life together?”

“How could you possible know that?” he challenged her.

“Let me show you,” she said quietly with a gesture toward his computer. “Judge the evidence for yourself and we’ll see if you come to the same conclusions.”

Hilary slid out of his seat and stepped aside. When Jess brushed past him the place where their bodies had touched tingled faintly. He rub absent-mindedly at the point of contact as he watched her work. Jess sat as tall as she could and began to draw up a series of records. Once she had all of them on screen, she waved him down to her height to have a look.

“This is the 1961 census I record which I showed you last week. Five years after your father’s birth. Your grandparents are shown to be living in a residence in London with a nursemaid, Rosemary.”

She paged through to the next document with a couple of clicks.

“Here’s the electoral register approximately two years later. The nursemaid is still living with them. The thing to notice is that they’re living in a two bedroom flat. If they’ve only got two bedrooms, either the nurse is sleeping in the same room as your seven year old father, or she’s sharing a room with your grandparents. And they’ve chosen to live off the patch - if it was financial, they could have taken a quarter. They’d have been eligible for a four bed.”

Hilary continued to watch, his eyes inscrutable.

“Then here’s a record from later the same year.”

“Looks like a hospital record?” Hilary hazarded a guess.

Jess nodded back.

“Yes, notice though, it’s for Rosemary, not Erin. But it shows both of your grandparents listed as her emergency contacts.”

Hilary scrutinized the record closely. Jess waited patiently, watching his expression for the moment when the record’s contents finally sunk in.

“She was hospitalised after miscarriage went badly?”

Jess nodded mutely. Waiting for the inevitable questions.

“But if she got pregnant, why would they take care of her rather than tossing her out?”

“Why indeed,” Jess asked quietly. After letting it sink in for a few more moments, Jess pulled up the final two records.

“This is the electoral register from a year later. It shows Rosemary still living in their home. Admittedly, it’s now on the patch. I checked; your grandfather’s post changed. But the important thing to note here is that Rosemary is still with them, though you’re father is 8 years old.”

“Old enough to no longer need a nurse.”

Jess didn’t reply, choosing instead to page forward to the next record.

“And this is a hospital record from two years later. This one’s for Erin. She’s being treated for what turns out to be angiosarcoma, a fast and very virulent form of cancer. Rosemary is listed on her record as being allowed to make medical decisions for her care along side your grandfather.”

Hilary looked at the records and Jess could see the wheels turning. She rose gracefully from his chair, careful not to touch him as she slid past and headed toward the door.

“I’ll leave those open for you to look over on your own. Think about the story they tell of your own family. And then think about us.”

Hilary barely noticed when the door shut quietly behind her.

~~oOOo~~

Fee slipped into the bio-lab and stopped abruptly. Before her sick leave, she’d been trying to force the poppies to bloom out of season as an offering for her Samhain altar. She thought she’d failed - none had even budded in time. Now sitting in front of her were a dozen potted plants in various states of bud with one having already blossomed.

Her mind stuttered. There was no way they should have been ready - not given the state they were in when she left. A note in scratchy handwriting was attached to the only one in full flower.

“For a Guardian, whose altar should always bloom. My apologies that they were not ready in time.”

The words caught her by surprise and caused the hairs to rise on the back of her neck. Only two people had ever applied that label to Fee; her sister, Mori, and former teacher, Skye.

Mori had used the word as a gentle tease, a reminder of her love and gratitude for the sacrifice Fee made in becoming an emancipated minor in order to take on responsibility for her sister when their parents died. As for Skye, Fee had never known why her teacher would occasionally refer to her as a guardian. The mysterious nickname had floated into a little used corner of Fee’s subconscious when her teacher’s death.

Each year at Samhain Fee had every intention of asking Skye for an explanation. But it somehow slipped her mind every time. In her own defence, this year’s ritual had strayed rather far beyond her plans, leaving precious little room in which to remember such details.

The handwriting was Matt’s, of that Fee was completely certain. She slipped the note into her pocket and went on a hunt for the errant civilian team leader.

She found him in another bio-lab, hidden away at the back of the ARC. The front half of the lab was covered in chemistry apparatus while the back half was an unkempt jungle of foliage. Fee swiped in, the door beeping her admittance and Matt looked up with surprise.

“Thank you.”

“Wha’ for?” he said, his brogue thick as usual.

“The poppies.”

“Tis tradition. ‘Poppies for remem’brance’. Was’t Shakespeare said tha’? I saw them growin’ in the lab. Figured tha’ was your intent.”

“How could you have known why I was growing them?” Fee pressed.

“Service record,” he replied shortly. “Religion’s listed.”

Matt didn’t bother to look up as he was carefully used a cotton swab to rub a golden dusting of pollen across the centre of each blossom in a batch of flowers.

Fee chuckled richly.

“You’ve done your research. I thought that only showed the generic term ‘other religions’ to admin users.”

“A mite of deduction, Fiona,” he said, looking up finally as he screwed the cap back onto the dish of pollen. “Combine ‘other religions’ an’ tha’ history you have of taking your vacation time to coincide with certain dates each year? T’was a dead giveaway.”

Fee smiled. “It’s been a while since anyone noticed. But again, thank you.”

“You’re welcome.”

“And why did you call me guardian?” She looked puzzlement at him.

“T’was raised by me mother’s people to respect anyone tha’ chooses to protect an’ serve. We were taught to call them Guardians.”

“Than I misunderstood you,” Fee said, ready to walk away.

“Wha’ exactly did you think I meant?” Matt asked, stopping her retreat.

Fee turned around with a sigh.

“What’s the one identifying mark I bear, Matt?”

“Tha’ tattoo on your wrist.” He replied quickly.

“To people who share my beliefs, it marks me as sworn to protecting others.”

“An’ tha’s different than bein’ a Guardian?” Matt looked at her, curiously.

She looked at him for a long moment. “My teacher always said it takes more sacrifice than that to claim a role as guardian.”

“’Tisn’t the same thing?” Matt questioned.

“No,” Fee said with slowly dawning comprehension. “I don’t think it is.”

“You’d offer your life without thinkin’. Tha’s no the biggest sacrifice tha’ can be offered?”

“Not quite,” Fee contradicted. “I offered my life to the service of my goddess a long time ago. In so doing, I accepted that there are many things I might someday be asked to sacrifice which will hurt far more than simply giving up my life. I walk in the space between Her hands with faith that She will keep me from harm.”

“Why speak so freely to me?”

“Your mother’s people have left you with an unusual legacy. For them to use the term guardian as an honorific suggests to me that they’ve known others sworn to oaths not dissimilar to my own.”

“Then the honorific still stands.”

“Is there any chance there’s anything written of why and how you’re family came to use that particular term?” Fee asked carefully.

“No,” Matt’s reply was quick and decisive. “The family’s stories hae passed down for generations from mouth to ear. We’ve nothing written of our tales.”

She sighed regretfully. “So many tales to entrust to nothing more than people’s willing ears. And probably four-fold that many have been lost to time and dust. Is there anything I can offer in repayment?”

“Consider them tribute to who you are an’ wha’ you believe. ‘Tis the least I could do in return.”

She nodded softly and turned to exit, murmuring a soft charm as she did so. As she passed the door-frame, her fingers brushed down its side, marking it with an unseen touch as a safe haven for those in need of refuge.

~~oOOo~~

Hils watched her warily as Fee slid into the chair at her desk. Even with distance he could feel that the fire beneath her skin was back, though nowhere near as harsh as it had been before their mistake. Shaking his head, he pulled together a batch of files. He needed a second opinion.

She looked up at him with curiosity when he perched on the corner of her desk and laid the files gently down in front of her.

“Read them, and tell me what you see. I’m seeing a pattern but I don’t think anyone’s paying attention without technical references. Consider it the re-payment of that forfeit you still owe.”

Fee touched lightly on the tie she’d maintained to his power and was suddenly, vividly aware of his anger and frustration. His warnings were being ignored and Hilary feared the deaths that mistake might bring.

She opened the first file and drew in a sharp breath.

“Some warning about the photos would have been nice, Hils! How the hell did you get hold of this file?”

“I’m still held against the Adjutant’s post. I get them automatically.”

She looked at him for a long moment.

“All of them?”

Not looking at her, he nodded. She winced and returned to her reading.

Two hour later, Fee got up with a rough and ragged shudder to approached Hilary’s desk. He looked up at her and there was something about his expression that had her fighting her geas as it tried to rise in protection of him.

“There’s definitely something odd going on.”

“Walk me through it.”

“This is the kind of thing the Lessons Cell at Land is suppose to be picking up on. But I’m guessing they’ve yet to receive these files?” She gestured at the three files classified as “Eyes-Only”; files that she wasn’t strictly speaking supposed to have access to herself.

“Without getting my hands on the remains of the devices, I’m fairly certain we’re looking at the work of a new and highly effective IED team. If one or more of them hasn’t been through our long course, then they’ve got a detailed set of notes on our training at the very least.”

“What makes you say that, Fee?”

She put six incident site maps side by side, and the device specs.

“They’re using an uncommon explosive yet its still military grade - not fertiliser and not forty year old left-overs from the Soviet occupation. We don’t routinely train our theatre dogs to detect this stuff any longer. The metal content is almost nil so the Vallon detectors wouldn’t be sensitive enough to pick it up.” She whistled between her teeth. “ It’s bloody perfect, Hils. The placement of these devices is taking maximum advantage of a weakness in our drills. Even high threat drills would probably only find one in a hundred of these bombs, and to find them reliably you’d have to be clearing the path one inch at a time on your damned belt buckle. They aren’t showing up in large enough numbers for someone higher up to have classified it as a pattern. And invariably the people being hit are C-IED and SF.”

She paused and he gestured encouragement for her to continue.

“This incident looks a lot like a theoretical exercise we did. A last ditch defence, aimed at maximum casualties to maintain possession of a location at all costs. If whomever’s implementing these changes isn’t contained, we’re looking at serious casualty figures.”

There was a brief flicker of distress on his face. “I was hoping I’d been seeing things. Could you write it up as a draft briefing? I’ll get Major Ryan to submit it.”

She snapped off a quick salute, trying to gain some levity in the face of a potentially ugly situation.

She grabbed the map she’d been scribbling on, pointing out four circles on the map.

“Who have we got operating in these areas?”

Hilary’s expression went blank for a moment as he mentally ran through what he could remember of the roster of specialist teams in that area.

“I don’t think we’ve got C-IED personnel in that zone right now. Most of them are supporting operation Omid Char.”

“Bugger. If I’m right, the next IED should be in one of these locations.”

He swore colourfully and across several languages and Fee had to smile, knowing how little Hilary’s father would approve of his gutter-mouth.

“What happens if we don’t have a fully-qualified disposal expert at one of the nearby bases?”

Fee made a sarcastic little gesture showing an explosion in her hands.

“Hils,” she said quietly. “They’re intentionally going after our SF teams.”

“Poor bastards.” Hilary whispered.

The next hour was spent in painful silence, as she tried to turn what she’d seen into a briefing document that might be taken seriously. Occasionally, she would refer to Hilary for an opinion; well aware that this level of documentation was one he’d been trained to at his father’s knee.

The answering smile she received when she emailed him the completed draft was worth the terrifying mess of what ifs and consequences she now had stuck inside her mind.

“Hils, I’m going to see if I can borrow Jess to go through her weapons drills. I need to do something mindless, see if I can get this out of my head for a bit.”

His answering laugh sounded a little forced but she appreciated the intent.

“I want to see if I can get the warnings through to a couple of friends in theatre. I’ll join you at the range once I’ve got this to Major Ryan.”

~~oOOo~~

Gliding into the command centre of the ARC Fee had to stop as she was struck by a wave of longing that left her speechless. She tried hard not to disturb Jess terribly often but Fee was still perpetually surprised by how often she needed just a moment of her lover’s touch. She found that it was one of the few things capable of bringing her down, helping her maintain balance within the storm of duties to her goddess and her country.

Fee chuckled quietly to herself as she realized her subconscious had already made the decision for her, feet closing the distance between them. She leaned in across the back of Jess’ chair to whisper lowly into the other woman’s ear. The field coordinator promptly went bright red and nodded. An answering smirk spread across Fee's face as she exited the room.

A few minutes later, Jess entered the armoury to find Fee petting the weapons. Being suggestive of how her lover’s hands had so often worked across Jess’ body, she found the sight surprisingly arousing. Fee locked the door, setting the code to permit access only for the captains’ wristbands.

“Please, kitten. I’ve got images in my head I need to shift.”

"You've got to be joking."

Fee hopped down from her perch, spinning Jess round and up into her place.

“It’s alright, kitten, I’ve taken the cameras offline.”

She leaned in for a kiss and Jess slipped her fingers beneath Fee’s t-shirt. Fee’s kiss was demanding before she dropped to her knees, unlaced Jess's ankle boots, and eased them off her feet. Her stockings and panties were the next casualty and then Jess squeaked as Fee dove straight for her goal.

"Fee ... Oh god." Jess's voice rose in pitch as Fee attacked her sweet spots with determination. It was rare they went for quickies, but Jess’ eyes fluttered closed as she rapidly headed toward bliss.

Fee smiled, tracing the markings for two quick spells and settling the rising power across skin like a caress. One would act as a lure for Hils and the other would send those not invited elsewhere. The crackle of power added to the stimulation of tongue and teeth had Jess peaking as the door suddenly opened. Her eyes were blown full and lush when they met Hils’ gaze and he froze with the door in hand.

Fee gentled Jess through the remainder of her orgasm then stood gracefully and turned to face him. Her smile was that of a cat that'd stolen the cream and there was something very feline about her movement as she stalked forward.

Hilary’s efforts to fend her off were only half-hearted. He chased the taste without thinking, and Jess moaned at the sight of them kissing. Suddenly he was shoving Fee away, the same panicked look she’d seen in their bedroom written large on his face once again.

Fee jolted at the flare of something that Hilary was trying and failing to control on his own. She yanked the power out of the room abruptly and before she could so much as open her mouth he was gone again.

Jess slipped down off the bench to glare at her lover.

“What the hell were you thinking Fee?”

“I had no idea - “ Fee murmured.

“You didn’t think he’d notice the power you were using and come looking?”

“No, that’s not it.” Fee shook her head quickly trying to organize her thoughts. “There's something eating at him, kitten, wrapped around the root of his oath. And - " She lost the end of what she was saying. Her gaze drifted downward appreciatively as Jess pulled her stockings back on and laced her shoes.

Jess turned around and narrowed her eyes at Fee.

"Give me my knickers, Fee! NOW."

Fee blushed to the roots of her red hair.

"Please tell me you didn't..." Jess pleaded.

Fee’s silence was reply enough.

Now it was Jess’s turn to blush hotly. “You slipped my knickers into his pocket? What in heaven’s name were you thinking? Were you thinking at all?"

Jess pushed away from the bench and turned to exit the armoury, hissing that they would discuss this in the evening.

~~oOOo~~

Jess took a deep breath and checked the CCTV feeds to be certain she knew where both of her erstwhile lovers had disappeared to before going on a hunt. She was acutely aware of the absence of her knickers as the moist heat of her inner thighs rubbed suggestively against her stockings.

Hilary had holed up in the quartermaster’s stores, running equipment checks that could have waited for Major Sayer’s return. Intent on not repeating Fee’s mistakes, Jess deliberately made noise as she approached, giving him plenty of warning of her presence.

“I’m so very sorry, Hilary. Please trust me when I say that I had no intention of taunting you in that manner.”

He shook his head. “I can’t do this now, Jess. There’s too much on my plate.”

“I understand,” she replied, trying to keep the hurt out of her voice. The last thing he needed was to heap more guilt on top of this mess. “Please, just don’t let this ruin your friendship with Fee. Or with me?”

He nodded, a slight tilt of the neck that Jess could easily have missed had she not been achingly aware of exactly how his body moved. Jess backed out of the QM’s stores muttering curses and imprecations against Fee the entire trip back to her terminals in the main command centre.

~~oOOo~~

Fee could sense Jess’ anger but knew better than to pounce on her as soon as they were alone. The drive home was ominously silent.

They’d promised each other early on that they would try damned hard not to go to sleep angry. Her lover had made it quite clear that certain things were not to be discussed in public nor while either of them was driving. One thing they’d easily agreed on was that arguing while driving putting others in danger needlessly.

Fee knew they would be discussing it once they reached the safety of the flat. She didn’t think that Jess did it consciously, but Fee still found it ironic that Jess always chose to have their arguments within the safe confines of Fee’s wards. For someone who’d never shown any metaphysical talents before the incident with the book and the blades, she was surprisingly perceptive.

Jess stalked off into the bedroom as soon as they were home. Fee could hear her slamming drawers as she found the clothing she wanted. When she came back out she was dressed casually in yoga bottoms and a vest. Having disposed of her jacket and boots, Fee was waiting on the couch when Jess was finally ready to talk.

“What possessed you to think that stunt wasn’t going to backfire exactly as spectacularly as it did?”

“I misread him. But in my defence, I hadn’t accounted for that mess wrapped around his oath. He enjoyed watching us together, so …” Fee rolled her shoulders. “... I was trying to get through to him. And when he found your knickers, it would be a nice surprise?”

Jess whipped around to glare at her in disbelief.

“Regardless of whether there’s something twisting him up on a metaphysical level, you knew damned well that he’s uncomfortable right now. Why the hell did you think it a good idea to poke at someone who’s a bit like an open wound?”

“Because, that open wound may as well be infected. I locked the armoury with a code only he and I had. He was the only one who could walk in on us and he should have known something was going on when I used that code.”

“Oh, so now you expect the man to be a mind reader, do you? Just because he’s fucked you a couple of times suddenly he’s supposed to be privy to your every thought?”

“He did a damn good job of reading my mind in theatre and in the field.” Fee fired back easily

“But the game’s changed, love,” Jess said with a little less venom. “You’re neither of you the person you were back then. You’ve both had time apart where you grew and became different people. You have to stop making assumptions where he’s concerned.”

Fee looked at her.

“Hils has changed but something about it is all wrong. It's like he's been forced. Kitten, you said his father hadn't trained him, not at all? Riding that oath, there are things that he should be doing that he isn’t. Some of my assumptions which should hold true don’t and I’ll be damned if I know why. My instincts and training are both screaming at me but the pieces I have still don’t form a complete picture.” She dropped her head.

Jess nodded and Fee took a deep breath before elaborating.

"I've met his father. He's nowhere as strong metaphysically as Hils should be, and he's got it under far tighter control. It never occurred to me until now to wonder why his father has such good control when Hils’ has nothing except instinct.”

Jess laid a soothing hand on her beloved’s shoulder trying to calm the growing fury.

“Fee, love, you’re going to have to back up and take this one step at a time. I’m still not seeing whatever it is you see.”

Fee looked over at her, finally seeing her once again.

“He’s not been trained. You said his grandfather tried to take him and teach him, but his father refused?”

“That was the gist of what I got from Hils.” Jess replied apprehensively.

“The only reason for me to have never before spotted that oath or the way it’s been perverted would be for it to have been spun from the same sort of energy born by Hils himself. And the only living individual capable of doing that is his father. But in order to accomplish it, he would have to have kept Hils less powerful. Being untrained would do that.”

Jess sucked in a harsh breath, finally beginning to see some of what had so horrified Fee.

“But if his father did that, when he dies wouldn’t Hils be left bearing the full burden of that oath? God, that’s not just a toddler with a gun. It’s a toddler with a semi-automatic who’s been taught to point it at himself.”

Fee nodded and made a grab for the waste bin finally giving in to her heaving stomach. Jess held her red hair out of the way and rubbed soothing circles into her back until the retching subsided.

“His grandfather lived long enough that he could have trained Hils if he’d been allowed to. By every indication, his father has at least another two decades left.”

“Why would anyone knowingly keep your own child in the dark like that?”

“I don’t know, though he must have a reason. Unless I’m reading their oath wrong? It hasn’t turned on Hils’ father yet, so he’s convinced himself what he’s doing is in his son and his family line’s best interest. The oath tastes like it demands defence; defence of his lands, defence of his blood and defence of his own with whatever he has available.”

Jess watched her continue to ramble, speaking more to herself than anyone else at this point. Fee’s expression turned dark and the crackle of lightning spun around the room, making Jess catch her breath.

“I swear I'm going to turn his father into that blood sacrifice I threatened to make of Hils last month. Because if I’m right, nothing short of blood spilt will set this right.”

“It’s that bad, love?”

“I’ve been able to taste Hil’s oath ever since he allowed me to ground through it. If his father has done what I think....it’s a perversion." She quivered, turning white in sickness and anger. "The moment he responded to that kiss in the armoury something rose up inside him. It could easily be mistaken for his oath but this was poisonous. It made Hils flee from the mere thought of his feelings for us.”

“How could a father place that sort of insidious mess inside his own son’s head?”

Fee shook her head with confusion. “It’s as if he’s trying to keep Hils from making other connections.”

“Family should be everything?” Jess said inquisitively, seeking confirmation of her interpretation.

“I can’t be completely sure, but whatever his precise intention was he’s using the family oath and attestation to make it stick.”

“Hils words - ‘No more nightmares for any of us’.” Jess whispered.

“Our flat is warded against nightmares! It’s the most basic defence on the bedrooms, and I certainly didn’t pull that one down."

“Which leads to follow that whatever it is comes from within his own head.” Jess interjected slowly.

The look on Jess’ face was one Fee normally associated with the height of her professional skills, her complete focus applied to a problem. In any other circumstance, it would have made her laugh with delight, but now she was simply grateful to have someone else thinking through the problem beside her.

“The shielding I have set should damp even one’s own nightmares. Skye developed them for when I insisted that I belonged in the Armed Forces. She spent a year perfecting it - wove it together from a dozen other spells, to blunt the ache of re-living another’s death.”

“Then was that statement simply born of fear? Too many nightmares past? He did say that he was broken inside.”

“Something forced him out of his bed; drove him to stand guard.”

“Guard,” Fee repeated thoughtfully. “That’s the second time that’s come up today.”

Jess looked at her shrewdly. “What were you dreaming, Fee? Because I know that I was sleeping dreamless at the time.”

“I dreamt of my unit. The night we lost our OC.” Fee shuddered violently, teeth chattering. “But I expected that as she was one of the ghosts that visited me at Samhain. Given some of the other ghosts that visited, it could have far been worse.”

“Hils came to protect you from yourself?” Jess asked her in puzzlement.

“I don’t know. But the nightmare did stop...” Fee conceded.

“As soon as you knew he was there to watch over us.” Jess finished the thought for her.

“There’s a loophole that allows for true dreams that are invited. What I did counts as such.”

“So he wasn’t there to stop you, just to offer you the ability to follow those dreams without worrying about me?” Jess hazarded a guess.

“That would make sense. I suspect it’s spelled into his oath. Even half asleep, somehow I must have recognized him enough to have no longer felt the need to protect you. The only thing strong enough to make me ignore the safety breach presented by those collapsed wards would be Hils’ oath.”

Jess’ finger stroked lightly across the mark on the inside of Fee’s wrist at the same time both a confirmation and an intimate gesture.

“If Hils’ oath is that strong, why would his father, who’s devoted his life to military service in the name of God, queen, and country, choose to pervert it?”

“That’s just it, baby girl.” Her eyes narrowed. “ For this to have worked, his father can’t think he’s perverted the oath in the first place. Hils’ oath is close to what attestation would look like if it were spelled as the foundation of one’s must basic beliefs. But he has the added drive to protect those he considers his own. Unless his father truly believes the foundation is different?”

“Like what?”

“You just said it; God and queen and country. Maybe I’ve read this all wrong, but somehow I don’t think General Becker is going to answer my questions. And I’ve got a nasty feeling I’m right.”


	15. Chapter 15

